Tuesday, December 30, 2008

Home is where the heart should be.

If I went back in time and told 20 year old me that in just 10 more years she would be comparing dishwashers and other large appliances she would have laughed at me took another swig from her cheap beer and ask me how I got so fat in just 10 years. For some reason up until we actually bought a house I just figured that we would go buy all our appliances right before we moved in. Along with the appliances would be any small renos we wanted to do and then we would just move in to our fresh new house. Except life isn't like that, especially not in Toronto when we were looking at houses during one of the hottest housing markets in history. Nope as soon as we started looking I realised that the dream of moving in with everything just so was only being kept by the new homes being thrown up in the suburbs and I'd rather have my toenails pulled out than move to the suburbs(nothing against the suburbs it's just not where we want to be right now.)

I daydream about coming home and finding out that Colin and Justin have chosen us. They could make gagging noises over the gawd awful beige carpet and dusty blue and pink kitchen and all the mismatched horror because I would be walking on a cloud, an incredibly wonderful fabulously decorated cloud. Partially because having those two redo our tiny bungalow into something that wasn't decorated in a decade I couldn't drink in but mostly because having a show like that would mean that I could focus on wedding planning knowing that one major two bedroomed hurdle was taken care of. Heck I'd even have get married at the house because I would be that chuffed about showing it off!

For Christmas we bought a washer and dryer set. Even though the house came with all the appliances they are all that weird yellowy beige colour and from department stores that no longer even exist. The dryer had one setting ON and it took about 4 hours on average to dry a small load of clothes. No, I'm not even exaggerating. We went to the appliance store and I stuck my head in ovens and freezers, pulled out dishwasher racks and pressed buttons. I inhaled that new appliance smell, which is probably some sort of toxic gas so I probably shouldn't have inhaled so deeply. I was in home owner heaven.

It's nice to have one thing checked off the list but the list is so long and it seems every day we have something new to add to it. Decorating is a mid level to do and it bums me out every time I come home. I should be happy I own a home, I know I am lucky to be able to in a large city. I know that these things take time unless you happen upon bags of money. I know. But in my head I imagine myself coming home to honey coloured floors and dream bedrooms or hosting dinner parties at a long table that has matching chairs or at least chairs that don't wobble. I dream of table runners and area rugs. I dream of a place where the dvds, video games don't decorate the mantle of the fire place. I dream of inviting living rooms and basement rec rooms. I dream of bathrooms with heated floors and marble counters and anything but the citrus coloured sparkly floral wallpaper that currently hangs there. I dream and I dream and I think that's part of my problem too much dreaming.

I cannot wait for our washer and dryer to arrive. I'm going to wash every thing I can get my hands on. I'm going to sit in front of them and watch things being properly washed. I'm going to watch as thing flip around in circles and I'll dream of honey coloured floors.

Sunday, December 28, 2008

Film inspired...The princesses.

When I was little one of my best friends parents got married in their living room with just my parents as their witness.
Even though I wasn't there the best part of the wedding was that my friend got to wear a tiara.
I don't remember what the tiara looked like, it wasn't too fancy, but it was sparkly and something both knew was special. Like the spray her mother had that instantly dried nails and the dress her mother had that had strings to create a bustle type effect on the front.
I would beg to wear it, just for a moment. Every second it was on my head I felt incredibly special.

I hadn't thought much about tiaras other than when I was watching Miss America or something similar.

Do I want a tiara? I'm not sure. But as my boss said "I totally did the whole princess for a day thing...it was awesome." and my boss is one of the coolest women I know so I put some stock into her opinion.

A couple of years ago I Googled "Audrey Hepburn Tiara" and came across http://www.tiaratown.com/
I have always loved Audrey Hepburn, she is the epitome of grace, beauty, kindness and style. And her movies are some of my most watched.

I cannot help but imagine that wearing a replica of a tiara worn by a character Audrey Hepburn portrayed just wouldn't rub off some her best qualities onto me.

Iam drawn to this one particularly. Maybe because it also reminds me of the tiara worn by the Childlike Empress in the Neverending Story which I watched obsessively when I was young.

Ok so it doesn't really look similar at all. Other than the slicked back hair and giant eyes. I'm not even sure I could pull this sort of look off. I personally think that it would only really work with a dress like this one...
Which reminds me of the Princess Bride...another favorite movie. There are so many different looks that I adore. How am I ever going to choose?

Tuesday, December 23, 2008

Party like it's 1999! (part two)

But the very next day he calls.

He invites me out. I accept. I make sure to tell him that I'm moving home in two weeks and not really looking for anything serious.

We then basically spend every waking moment together after our first "date" we stay up talking until dawn. We watch back to back Law and Order and The Price is Right and drink endless amounts of tea. Every second I'm away from him I'm anxious to see him again. By the end of week one I'm hanging out with his friends who I invite to my party as well.

Day of my party and I'm making vodka jello shooters and spending the day basically making sure I look hotter than Hades. Then it hits me. I'm moving 2 hours away in one week. I even told him that I didn't want anything serious. Oh. The party is a blast, jello shooters will do that. I make sure to drown my sorrows with lots of jello shots and even more Southern Comfort.

The next week is basically a repeat of the week before, it's bliss. When I'm away my heart aches and all I can do is clock watch until I see him again. Then suddenly it's my last day in town. I'm sure I probably cried. I gave him my parents number and we parted ways and all I could think is "He's not going to call. It was just a summer fling." I do some beating up of myself for letting myself feel such things when I was the one who didn't want anything serious. "Stupid, stupid, girl" I think.

Of course he called.
We talked every single night for hours and hours. Then one night suddenly he says "I was just wondering...if you'd be my girlfriend?" I hadn't been asked to be someones girlfriend since...ohhh grade school and thought it was the sweetest thing ever.
Of course I said yes.

Six months later we move in together. He finishes his masters and we paint our apartment the wild colours 20 somethings always seem to. He learns to love my dog who was just six months old when we had met. We get a cat. We move to the city. We buy a house and a year later we get engaged.

I think that even if I hadn't met him in those last weeks of August in 1999 then we would have met eventually. We went to all the same concerts and went to all the same bars in the city. We both think that we would have met at some point somewhere. We were just in the right place at the right time that night.

Party like it's 1999! (part one)

The Mister and I have been together a very long time. Just over 9 years actually.
So let's go waaay back to a simpler time a time when I worked retail in a music store and he was just about to start his masters.
Let's go back to the Summer of 1999. The last few weeks of August to be exact.

That summer found me working in a music store in a mall that had been forgotten. So forgotten that most of the stores in the mall were shut because the city I lived in had 4 other bigger malls dotting the landscape that were all in more residential areas. I won't get into the poor urban planning of the city but for a whole mall to basically have 90% of it's stores close up shop because no one wanted to travel to it's poorly planned location is odd. I spent the summer basically slacking with my coworkers and preparing the store for it's closure.

Once a week most of us would go out to a bar for it's soul music night. It was a weekly ritual that involved drinking and a lot of laugh and a lot of greasy breakfasts the next day.

I wasn't looking for boyfriend at all. In fact I was in the process of moving back to my parents house once the store closed. So one week we are at the bar celebrating another co-workers birthday, which only meant that we were drinking more than we normally would. I'm standing there talking to my friend and I look across the patio and see two guys talking to a guy who works at a different record store. One of them is staring right at me. A minute later I look again and he's still staring right at me. I get my friend to check after a bit and sure enough he's still staring. Now if he hadn't been super hot I probably would have been creeped out by his fixation instead after what seemed like a very long time I decided that I'm going to go over and say hello.
As I go over to say hello to the guy I know both guys he's talking to go to the bar. So now I'm stuck talking to this other guy and I'm stalling waiting for the guys to come back. Finally they do and introductions are made and I'm thinking "wow you sure are beautiful up close." theres some chatting and asking silly questions about music. We each go back to our friends and the night ends. He shows up the next week and we chat some more at the end of the night I see him leaving with a friend and I do something unexpected I follow him. Yes I stalked him all the way to the pizza place up the street. I sit outside and pretend to be doing up my shoe for what seems like an eternity until they finally come out and I act all "ohh hey! funny bumping into you!" I invite them to my going away party the following Saturday, I tell him to take my number but no one has paper and pen. He says he'll remember it. I'm doubtful given that it's 3am and we've both been drinking.

Monday, December 22, 2008

I'm a polyvorer too...

spring time by somethingweddings

Like every single other blogging bride to be I too have been sucked in to the fun world of Polyvore. Who doesn't like making a collage of things they like? It brings me back to my youth and all the cutting out of catalogs I did. A friend and I used to spend days planning our trip around the world in a school bus. Of course we were going to gut the school bus and put in bunk beds, a kitchen and a bathroom. We spent hours pouring over various catalogs and magazines cutting out everything we were going to need for our grand adventure. Five year olds don't really have a good concept of what is needed for a round the world trip but apparently we needed a lot of linens.

Since it is looking more and more like we are going to be having a Spring wedding in 2010. My first thoughts for colours were gray,yellow and teal. Each fall I plant a ton of daffodils as the squirrels don't bother them and love when they all come up in my garden. Since I know who I'm going to have in my bridal party(but haven't officially asked them.) I am taking into consideration what colours look good on them. Gray looks lovely on all of them. I have never considered floor length dresses before but the one about is simply lovely and could very obviously be worn again, dressed up or down and wrap dresses are flattering to all shapes. Heck they could even get it shortened if they wanted! Add some teal accents and some spring blooms in the happiest sunniest of colours and I think you have a certain modern elegance that looks lovely.

Sunday, December 21, 2008

Losing it.

Right now my kitchen smells like banana bread. Banana bread full of walnuts and chocolate and peanut butter chips. YUM!

About 4 days after we became engaged I had my yearly physical. I knew I had gained weight(again) once we moved to the house my time at the gym became next to nothing and my eating habits got a bit out of control. So that morning at my doctors I stepped on the scale in that lovely paper gown thinking that at worst I had gained 5lbs or so.

No. Because I'm so awesome I gained 11lbs in one year. Leaving me just 4 lbs under my heaviest known weight. I say "known" because there is a photo of me looking like I'm probably another 15lbs heavier than that.

So about a week after my doctor told me the grim news I decided to stop eating sugar, flour and junk food. Sticking fresh vegetables, lean cut meats and low G.I foods. I only drink water, green tea and I cut back my coffee intake. All of the things you're told to do. I started taking the stairs almost every time(hey I'm far from perfect!) Basically I eat a lot of salads now and measure out a lot of things into serving sizes. Like I said, I'm not perfect, so there have been slip ups. Especially as the holiday season started to get into swing. Losing weight isn't easy. It's slow and steady work and it's a constant battle and one that I admit I will probably have to deal with for a long time coming.

So after a month and a bit I have lost about 10lbs. If I can mantain that lose during the holidays I'll be happy. In the new year I'm going to join a local pilates studio and restart exercising 4 times a week. I told myself that I wouldn't start trying on wedding dresses until I've lost 25lbs, which is half of my goal weight.

Funnily enough I only really feel like baking when I'm making friends with salad. Of course the Mister loves it, as he keeps complimenting my "hot new body" (his words not mine!) and I insist he takes all my baked goods to work! It's a win-win!

Friday, December 19, 2008

Hello there...

Why hello there Internet! Fancy meeting you here!

Welcome to my tiny nook of wedding blogging. It still feels odd to use wedding in a sentence that talks about myself. I'm still pretty new to the whole shiny rock on finger deal but by no means am I wet behind the ears in my knowledge of weddings and all things that come with them.

I wasn't one of those girls who grew up dreaming about a big fairy tale wedding. For a long time I swore that I wanted to get married where ever I had met my husband to be and if that was the local coffee shop so be it! White wedding dress? NOT ME!! No I would most definitely get married in red or black, I look horrid in white!! I admit my thoughts have changed slightly since then but I am still rather eccentric at heart and like to do things a wee bit more my way..erm our way.

I have lots of weddings already planned in detail up in my head. I always thought that once we became engaged it would just be a matter of picking the right one from the file folders of my brain and then hit the ground running. Except I've got so many up there and I'm always coming up with new ones that I need somewhere to put them. Enter blogging. Although I'm no stranger to blogging, this wedding blogging business seems rather serious.

Anyhow the Mister is playing The Smiths singles on 45" vinyl for me so I suppose I should go join him and quit ruining my posture by hunching over this laptop.