Something Weddings

HEYYYY its a whole new year.....er decade!!!

2010-01-03T18:39:00.003-05:00

Yes I abandoned this blog. I just couldnt figure out what to write anymore.

Now Im writing over here....Playing Haus if you care to pop in.

I will probably be swearing more.

And now, the end is near......

2009-10-21T18:21:00.006-04:00

So now that I'm married I find I have nothing to say(at least about weddings!)

Looking back it was a bumpy ride, totally worth the ride once we arrived at the destination but boy oh boy there were times I was basically thisclose to checking myself into a "health spa".

Do I have regrets? Not for a second. I enjoyed trying on dresses that cost more than a down payment on a house but would I have coughed up the dough for one? Heck no! For me, personally, as much as I fell repeatedly in love with the gloss and glitter of the wedding industry I just couldn't get on board with spending so much money on one day. What can I say I'm cheap!

Eloping is not for everyone BUT I highly recommend it for those who it clicks with! Not one person who might have been upset by the surprise was(at least they didn't tell me they were!). I happen to think that anyone in my life who would have been upset by our eloping would obviously not have really known us. We'd been together ten years so it wasn't like we ran off in the middle of the night and got hitched!

I avoided family drama, which when you have a million relatives is pretty unavoidable! I avoided my mom showing up in a sequined red dress. I avoided having my sister have a nervous breakdown because she has a severe anxiety over making speeches. I avoided drunken relatives picking fights with other drunken relatives(oh it's happened at family weddings.)

I avoided everything that would have caused me to turn into a ball of panic and anxiety. I wanted to get married to the man I loved, simple really, so I did. It was awesome.

This weekend my the parents will have their first meal together as inlaws...should be interesting.

Oh and last weekend my lady friends had a dinner for me. So I'll recap that once I get over the embarrassment of the photos and video(errrgh so drunk.) and then....well then I have something up my sleeve...

What's that smell?

2009-10-14T10:31:00.003-04:00

This past weekend my worst nightmare came true.

Just as we were about to go out for the evening our dog made friends with a skunk, just outside our back door. It pretty much got only her face, it may have sprayed her directly in the mouth actually. YUM!

Apparently when you smell skunk outside that is it after it's blown around, pure skunk smells more like a big pile of burning tires. The dog didn't appreciate the bath or the dunking with tomato juice(which only sort of works but at 9pm on a Sunday before Thanksgiving it was the only option...lesson learned? Keep a bottle of skunk odor remover handy always.)

The house smells just from it wafting in through the back door! I've been busy spraying every surface with skunk odor remover. Before the skunking I already had a paranoia of things smelling bad, so now that seemingly everything smells slightly skunking I'm driving myself(and others) mad.

My sister gave me a Lampe Berger and I'm simply in love with it. Although the current scent is a bit too perfumey I plan to switch it up soon to something warm for the winter. It seems to be working a bit to get rid of the skunky smell. I'm so thankful that we only have carpet left in one room and it will soon be gone. If we still had the carpet in the living room I would have insisted that we move out!

Hows married feel?

2009-10-06T14:35:00.003-04:00

I've been a bad, bad blogger, I haven't wrote or read any blogs in a week! Life happens right? That's what I've heard anyhow.
Last week I went to my first appointment with a geneticist. I'm being tested for something rare and scary called Cadasil Syndrome. The geneticist said it was highly unlikely that I did have it so I'm not wringing my hands raw or anything.

Being married (for me anyhow) is very much the same as before except with more jewellery and tax breaks. Not that I'm being glib about it but when your with someone for ten years, living with them for most of those well...it doesn't feel much different. I'm married and that's cool, but life altering changing? Well not really. Although I'm incredibly relieved we eloped in the end because if we would have spend $$$$ on a big wedding I might have some buyers remorse right about now. We are slowly starting to throw around ideas for our party. We recently went to a beer tasting and the food was catered by a bakery and it was soooooo good. It was The Mister who even suggested we keep the name of the place!

jj

2009-10-01T20:20:00.002-04:00

This is the photo that we will give to family and friends, as my aunt said "It's a framer!

I was asked by The Marry Melodies how it feels to be a Mrs, a whole bunch of people have asked me this since we got hitched. So I figured I'd write about it.

It feels pretty much the same. I joke that the only difference is I have more jewellery and tax breaks. Which is true but there is also something slightly different. A part of my sort of wishes there was something noticable. Something I could point at and go "aha that's what married feels like." but there isn't. Theres always a bit of disappointment when you have some big life event happen and afterwards your life doesn't become technicolour. I can fully see why some brides have the post wedding blues, all that hype and months planning and then after it's all over and the thank you cards are sent it's back to life as it was.

Don't get me wrong, I'm so happy we are married, but after being together for 10 years

2009-09-30T16:49:00.001-04:00

This is the photo that is getting blown up, framed and given to friends and family. The orginal version is a million times better than this blogger shrunken version.

Waiting for the music to start.

2009-09-29T15:30:00.003-04:00

Another oddball photo that I like. Although The Misters suit looks like an optical illusion it's a fine hounds tooth. In the cab over to the court house I nervously tugged at the sweet peas in my bouquet but they were stuck in there good so I ended up with stray flowers. I tucked them into the bouquet afterwards.

Because the ceremony was so short we only got through the first 3 songs of our cd....

1. Please, Please, Please(Let Me Get What I Want) String version of the Smiths song.
2. Northern Sky - Nick Drake
3. Time After Time - Dusty Springfield
4. I'm in Love With a Girl - Big Star
5. You Do Something To Me - Paul Weller
6. Never My Love - The Association (seriously check this song out for first dances.)
7. To The End(La Comedie) - Blur

Short and sweet.

2009-09-28T10:11:00.002-04:00

The ceremony was short. As in I blinked back some tears and we were married short. She read some things about rights and houses, we held right hands(which was funny because it was like we were shaking on it.) He said "YES! I DO!!" and I replied "Thanks!!" I said the same back to him, we put our rings on and kissed. We signed more things, our witnesses signed things and BAM we were legally bound.
We took photos, we called our parents, we took more photos, we bought some pink champagne and cupcakes and hopped in a horse drawn carriage(something we've never done, too touristy.) and it was perfect. The horse tried to eat my flowers.
Here is one of my favorite photos. I like my photos like I like my men, a bit quirky.

Lets go to court (or my dad's middle name isn't Anne.)

2009-09-25T20:27:00.004-04:00

We agreed to not see what the other was wearing. Which would have been easier if we had not been getting ready in the same room! We were going to meet at the court house at 1pm. I arrived back at the hotel at noon. I started my make up. I had brought my false eyelashes, something I'm a pro at putting on, but I hadn't been able to find the regular glue I use and had bought a different brand which was gummy so I decided to abandon them. I got everything else on and did one eye with liquid liner when I decided to look at the time. Some how it was 12:35, my witness was coming to my room at 12:45. Oh and did I mention that Mister was still getting dressed? Right then my body gave me a surge of adrenalin, which unfortunately for me causes me to shake uncontrollably until I work it out, which I couldn't since I couldn't really move from my chair! I wish it was a panic attack I can deal with those so much better!

Ever try putting on liquid liner when you are shaking like a leaf? Yeah, exactly.

My witness came and Mister left and finally I could finish getting ready. We left the room at 1:10.
Court house, up to the 3rd floor. I see the Mister for the first time and he looks amazing, like I knew he would. He always does though. He told me I looked really beautiful and hot.

Then we sat down with our Justice of the Peace, a woman named Nadia who had her two girls there with her that day. A sweet little girl around 6 years old and a girl who was maybe 13.

We looked over our information for mistakes. There was one. They had my dad's middle name down as Anne, the same as my mothers. After clearing that up they popped in our cd and the music started.

hoo

2009-09-25T20:23:00.002-04:00

Flowers!

2009-09-25T10:02:00.003-04:00

Photo by me, taken in front of the window in our hotel room. Sweet back lighting.

As I mentioned before I always knew I would do my own flowers. For a brief moment where I may have been temporarily insane I had a grand plan of waking up and going to Jean Talon or Atwater market at 7am and strolling around eating a croissant and picking out flowers. Luckily that notion passed and I realised that more than likely I would rather sleep in! Good thing too since we didn't go to bed until 3am the night before!

After taking stock of what was in perfect bloom in my garden I headed out the Friday morning to the local flower markets and bought about 35 dollars worth of flowers all in shades of purple. I got tiny white carnations that were streaked with purple, roses, pom pom dahlias, tiny kale, lisianthus and some filler. I went home cut some more dahlias and sweet peas.
Now if I was a good blogger I would have taken step by step photos...but alas I did not, so instead here is the play by play....

I stripped all the flowers of thorns and leaves, put aside any that were looking a bit sad and then starting with the kale I placed them in my left hand making X's with the stems and turning every now and then until I had what I wanted. Then holding it like a bouquet I decided if I needed to move things or add things and then about 15 minutes after I started I wrapped it in some floral tape, cut all the stems to one length under water and then set it in a vase with some water at the bottom for the trip. I picked tough flowers. Other than the lisianthus and sweet peas all the other flowers could take some beating. I also took along several extra flowers just in case and although I didn't need them I did remove one flower that got the droops during it's trip, since it was near the base it didn't even matter.

The day of the wedding I took them out of the vase, dried the stems with a towel and covered the floral tape with some ribbon that I just tied in a bow. I left the bouquet at the hotel taking only some roses to press at home. Also I'd like to point out that the 35 dollars I spent on flowers from the market gave me enough flowers that I could have easily made 2-3 smaller bouquets after making mine. Instead I threw them in a vase and left them in my kitchen.

2009-09-25T09:58:00.002-04:00

As I mentioned before I always knew I was going to do my own flowers. For a brief moment where I may have been completely insane I had this grand plan of getting up at 7am and going to a Marche and just eating a croissant and picking out flowers. Then I regained my sanity and realised that more than anything I'd probably want to sleep in. Which was a good thing because the night before we didn't get to bed until 3am!!

2009-09-24T15:02:00.002-04:00

By the time I get back to the hotel it is noon. The Mister and I had agreed not to see each other in our outfits and that we would meet at the court house at 1pm. Except he was still in the room and pretty much fresh out of the shower. So I stood around in the hall waiting for him to put on a robe and hide whatever needed hiding.

Ok so I had an hour to do my makeup and get dressed. Oh and I couldn't look at him. So I parked myself at the desk by the window and started doing my makeup. First I set out everything I needed in the order I needed them and then I started. I made sure not to turn my head to the left. I had grand ideas of putting on fake lashes, which I'm a pro at, but not being able to find my regular eyelash glue I had settled for a different brand and I hated it. It was thick and gummy and after two attempts at getting them on I abandoned them. I also decided that I would wear liquid eyeliner. Something I actually do not wear on a regular basis. I got one eye done and it was perfect but without being able to turn I was having trouble twisting my arm around to my other eye. At that point I looked at the clock. 12:34. I remember thinking "This eyeliner needs to be done in 6 minutes." as my witness was coming at 12:45.

Then I started shaking. Not a great thing to do when applying liquid eyeliner to the difficult eye. I wasn't scared or anxious this was the familiar shake of adrenalin. My heart was pounding and I was shivering in my chair. I managed to ride the surge out but I used up my 6 minutes of eyeliner time. I finished the eye, fixed it and made the other eye match. Phew. My witness came and The Mister left leaving me with 15 minutes to finish up.

We were running a bit late though and didn't get into a cab until 1:10.

Now I don't know if it's because the cabbie thought we were tourists since we were exiting a hotel but OH MY DOG did he drive sloooooow and no matter how many times we repeated the address, in both langauges, he acted like he had no clue what we were saying.

The Montreal court house is a very sterile looking office building. It's very out of character for the area it's set in, which is Old Montreal. We travelled up to the 3rd floor.

2009-09-24T09:27:00.000-04:00

Who says you cantelope

2009-09-23T11:25:00.003-04:00

So the only thing I didn't get on my list? Cardboard.

See under pressure = results!

I woke up on Friday morning at 7am and after a long breakfast, coffee and dog walk left at around 10am. By noon I had got everything and was sitting in a massage chair getting my nails did. After ruining my nails in record time(seriously does nail polish just not dry until you've messed one up?) I went home and packed, cleaned and made my bouquet.

Our witnesses picked us up and we drove and drove and drove and got to Montreal just before midnight, we would have got there earlier if Google maps hadn't given us the longer route and if we hadn't missed our last cut off. Luckily I know Montreal really, really well and guided our friend onto a faster route than turning around and doubling back to the missed cut off.

The hotel had upgraded us to a King suite which over looked the cathedral, which was so nice. We freshened up, changed clothes and went out for drinks at Le Cheval Blanche which is really cool looking inside, very retro. Surprisingly it was rather empty for a Friday night. We went bed around 3am.

The next day we got up around 9. I had a shower and headed to the hotel salon for my 10am appointment, my stylist was running late, which was fine a few minutes wouldn't ruin anything, I had tons of time. They served me an espresso and I sipped it slowly. She finished the girl she was working on at about 10:20. I switched into her chair and showed her photos and told her I wanted BIG 60's hair, the bigger the better. She started to round brush blow dry it and then about a minute of that asked me if it was ok if she finished another client who was getting colour done. Because I'm such a laid back person I said sure, figuring she was just going to blow her dry.

Nope, she was going to cut her hair and then style it and then the girl would say "oh can you also straighten it a bit?" as the minutes past I got more and more anxious. I hadn't ate breakfast and was already on my second coffee and OH MY GOD I WAS GETTING MARRIED HURRY THE FUCK UP!!!!! Finally she came back to me at 10:55.

She then proceeded to disregard the photos and when I said something she suggested that I just "wait and see, it looks lovely." which is also what she said when her two previous clients also asked for changes. The part I had questioned was the back, where I just wanted sleek and put into a french twist she did something "fun!" to which I replied that I "wasn't really a fun hair type of gal. I want big and 60's"

She finished my hair and then proceeded to spray it solid and I swear to God she purposely sprayed me in the face with hair spray. She wasn't nasty or anything, just the opposite really, and I was in such a good mood that I was letting things slide that I normally wouldn't. My hair took about 15 minutes to do. OH and about 3 minutes into starting my hair she told her manager that she could take a client at 11:30.

My hair was solid as a rock but it looked ok. Also it was $$$ which for 15 minutes of time and being an HOUR late sort of irked me, but I didn't complain at the time because I had a million other things on my mind. Plus it's just hair and I could fix what I didn't like, which in the end meant I ran my fingers through the tops and sides to unsolidify it and my veil hid the "fun" bit at the back. I hadn't wanted to look around for a salon, I wanted somewhere I could just wake up and go to and nothing was closer than in the hotel so really it's no biggie.

I then headed out to find myself some food. I found a turkey and swiss croissant at a Au Pain Dore and walked back to the hotel. It was yummy and I thought "I should get more updo's and eat more turkey swiss croissants while walking around." and then "This is the last bit of food I'll eat before I am married."

More later.

Married

2009-09-21T22:19:00.001-04:00

So what did you do over the weekend?

TWO!

2009-09-17T09:15:00.002-04:00

Here is my list of things to do:

Shoes
Sephora
Perfume
Spanx
Suitcase
Dye hair.
Clean house
Cardboard
Foot petals
Sort makeup
Laundry
flowers - floral tape
ribbon
Print hair photos

If I didn't work best under tight deadlines then I'd be worried, but I look at my list and think about all the times I've pulled off doing more in less time and am not worried one bit.

I'm super excited because I got some Polaroid film! Thank you hipster oasis that is Urban Outfitters! Sure I paid more than I've ever paid for it in the past...about double. The other night I dusted off my gaggle of cameras I think I'm going to bring my Fed5, SLR, Polaroid and digital. Yes I'm going to bring 4 cameras.

THREE!

2009-09-16T11:02:00.002-04:00

Something I don't think I mentioned is that The Mister and I don't know what the other is wearing. Some brides would lose their shizz not knowing what the groom was going to show up in, not me, I can say without a doubt that The Mister will be very well dressed. He has amazing style when it come to clothes, in fact I'd say he's the more stylish one. Also it helps that he's hot, like rock star, woman check him out all the time hot. Sure he's not every ones cup of tea but he sure as hell seems to be a lot of ladies that like his particular blend.

I think he might be wearing brown. Yep that's it, that's all I might know and it's not a confirmed colour just something he mentioned a few weeks back. The only thing I said to him was "you don't have to wear a suit, just dress however you want."

So I'm going shoe shopping today. At first i wanted red shoes, but I think I might get purple. Really I'll just see what's in the shops and go from there. I was coveting some Kate Spades but I think I had a case of "It's my wedding so I should haves" you know, that weird sickness that brides to be get where we can justify anything because gosh darn it's your wedding!
A part of me would LOVE to spend 500 dollars on shoes, and trust me it's a really big part! But the frugalista in me says "but you could spend less and get XYZ as well and haven't you always really wanted XYZ?" it's a constant battle of the Chanel Angel on one shoulder and the Gap Angel on the other. And boy do they fight dirty!

FOUR!

2009-09-15T10:47:00.003-04:00

In all my years of visiting Montreal it has never rained. Please go now and knock on wood. I'm looking at that forecast and thinking that Friday rain better stay put! I could deal with a bit few more degrees on the thermometer but 16 is pretty nice still. I'm praying (something I rarely do unless I really, really mean it.) that whatever system(a big L or H) moves swiftly through Montreal the rain is pushed off until Monday. Fingers crossed!

I figured out the dress issue. I spent all last night stuffed into Spanx and trying on every dress in my closet. I then flipped the original dress inside out and took a good look at the seam allowance. I stuffed it in a bag with my dry cleaning and decided if my seamstress could let it out by Thursday then it's sign. Really it only needs maybe an inch total not much.

So I went in and showed them the dress. We all stared at the seams and I held my breath.
It's doable! They can let it out, not by much, by about an inch!!!

I was worried that it would cost me an arm and a leg. It didn't even cost a pinky toe! I pick it up Thursday. Even though I said I wasn't freaking out having them say that it was doable felt like someone told me they could cure gray hair, just something I no longer have to worry about!

I wasn't freaking but I wasn't not freaking if you know what I mean.

FIVE!

2009-09-14T11:37:00.002-04:00

What's that? Five days until I get married? Really? Huh! Doesn't seem like that long ago I was just tossing eloping around as an idea. And now? Well the cost of it showed up on my last credit card bill so there's no turning back now!

Most brides to be would be faa-reaking about not having a dress and I'm sure that a part of my brain is working overtime mentally running around shouting "FIRE!!!!" but I seem to have successfully learned to ignore it.

Thing is I know I'll wear something. Maybe it will be the original dress I bought, maybe it will be my Nanette Lepore, maybe it will be the pale blue dress that I've worn once, or the silk floral print dress I saw on the weekend....thing is I'm not going to end up going in my underpants(although the ones I bought a few weeks ago are fancy enough to get married in...)!

I've got options and maybe it's not the dress of my dreams, but my tall order for a perfect dress that was the perfect price just wasn't going to happen. The only way it would happen is if Coren Moore somehow found my blog, took pity on me and sent me her polka dotted Ruby dress via Fed Ex for this Thursday with a 60% discount or more. I mean miracles happen right?

Over the weekend I also figured out how were going to tell our friends and family that we went and got ourselves hitched!

I also decided to include geranium leaves in the flowers. I'm sort of in love with them and since I have tons of them in my garden I'll just bring some along.

Oh and I saw Joe Jonas of the Jonas Brothers running with some body guards by my work.

Eight days a week!

2009-09-11T10:59:00.002-04:00

I'm trying not to stress out but with eight days(we leave in 7) to go I'm dressless, shoeless and eating candy non stop. I may or may not have started my day today with candy and coffee. Maybe.

I do however have a veil. I practically blinded myself making it. I've likened it to sewing fog with invisible thread. I mean if nothing else comes together then at least I have a veil! Oh and flowers I'll have those too and big hair and makeup and rings. I'm just missing the clothes.

One of my BFF's Savs (who sometimes reads this here blog HI!!!!) and I were talking on the phone yesterday and she asked me if I had my something old, new, borrowed, blue and I was all "yeps got it covered!" and then I thought about it more. I have my something old, my Nanny's charm bracelet, I have lots of new, I'm going to wrap something blue around my flowers....but borrowed....I don't have anything borrowed. I can't even remember what any of my married friends had for their borrowed things....I'm guessing jewellery? But I only want to wear my Nanny's bracelet...I do have my ears pierced but borrowed earrings? Isn't that like borrowed mascara?

What can I borrow?

A girl has to eat.

2009-09-07T18:41:00.002-04:00

I did so much research into where to go for dinner. I bookmarked reviews, looked for photos and blog postings, read menus and assembled a list.
The Mister emailed a dj friend of his who grew up and lives in Montreal and asked then for recommendations. She came back with one or two and like a dog with a bone The Mister would not even consider any other place except for this one that she mentioned.

L'Express. A Montreal "institution". A place where a trusted critic last reviewed in '05 noting that they served about 400 plates a day and some of those are pre-prepared and microwaved(shudder) but when it became clear than all of my deeply researched restos were not going to even be considered I threw in the towel and told him to go ahead and make reservations, which he did in flawless french.

I'm really, really, really hoping that the food isn't awful. They do serve a big jar of cornichons(baby pickles) when you sit down. Luckily I love cornichons so I could easily fill up on those.
They don't have a website so I can only go by a menu I found on Flickr but it's classic french bistro. I just keep reading review after review that notes about the rudeness of the service and my go to for foodie advice, Chowhound, well...every time a tourist says they are thinking of going there the foodie locals point them in another direction.

Maybe I should just insist on poutine.

2009-09-05T17:21:00.002-04:00

When I woke up this morning the Mister turned to me bopped me on the nose(we tap each others noses and go "bop!") and said "Only 15 more days!"

Make it big.

2009-09-03T10:53:00.005-04:00

I'm still congested. It's something that happens when I'm sick I stay congested for a good few weeks after. Not fun but at least my nose is no longer bright red and covered in scales. GROSS!

So here I am 16 days from getting married. Yowza!

I have a hair appointment at the hotel salon that morning. Seeing as I've never been there or met the stylist I admit to being a tiny bit anxious. But since I tend to be a wash and wear ponytail type of gal anything will pretty much look better than what I normally look like. I know I want volume, something my hair fine hair does not naturally give me. I know I want big, big hair with some curl or wave? Something like these......

But I'm unsure if I want a half up do, I'm pretty sure the down part would become limp fairly soon after leaving the salon. Also, I don't know why but a full up do feels a bit more...special to me. Something like these...

I'll bring all these photos along so the stylist knows I'm not exaggerating when I say I want BIG hair.

I fought the bra, but the bra won....

2009-09-01T21:07:00.003-04:00

Today I went for a proper bra fitting at a lovely little shop called Brava. As I mentioned before The Mister gifted me with a gift certificate so I could "get something hot for our wedding night" so I went in to get fitted. If you haven't been fitted for a bra before I highly suggest you do, you might be surprised to find out that you are wearing the wrong size! The very first fitting I ever had I had been wearing a 36A(this was a very, very long time ago.) when I was sized it turned out that I was actually a 34B. I usually get fitted about once a year. The last time I was fitted was sometime this past winter, I was a 38C.

Today I was told that I was a 36D. Wowza. Shrunk some and gained some! The lovely lady who helped me try on various bras made me feel at ease, which is not always something I feel when a stranger sees me half naked. She brought me an assortment of lovely bras to try on and helped me get in them, you would think that after so many years of bra wearing that you could do it yourself, but alas the put it on backwards, spin it forward and flip it up method was not going to fly when faced with a 200 dollar brassiere. She had me put my arms through the straps and then lean forward so everything would fall (quite literally) into place as she did me up and adjusted things.

Some bras were instantly rejected for just looking odd or doing nothing for my figure. One bra even gave me points! I instantly fell in love with two. One a lilac coloured leaf embroidered number and one that was a sheer blue lacy number. Lilac won. It was close though if they were the exact same price I'd probably still be flipping coins in the change room! Lucky for me though the blue bra was 198 dollars and the matching pantie a mere 98 something that made me blink and wonder if I was seeing things. 98 dollars for one pair of panties? Do they know I can get a 6 pack of cotton Hanes for 10? I can see though how a gal could easily become addicted to wearing pricey lingerie. The fit, material and detail are all so much more better and sexy than the beige run of the mill everyday bras I've been wearing most of my life. Plus knowing that your rocking something exquisite under your clothes is a bit of a thrill!

I also bought a silk negligee, that was 30% off, it's sexy, probably the sexiest thing I'll ever wear to bed. It wasn't really in the budget but heck a married woman needs a negligee!

I smell something.

2009-08-31T21:05:00.004-04:00

Something I've been thinking about is what scent I'm going to wear. Some girls have a signature scent, a classic go to that they wear either daily or seasonally. I on the other hand have a perfumery. At one point I had about 50 or so perfumes all of them kept in a dark box in a cool spot and rotated at my whim. Theres the perfume that I was wearing during our early courtship, Lolita Lempicka, along with a subtle violet scented body cream from Boots which I've never found after that first jar. I had a variety of Demeters, which were great because they were cheap and cheerful and wore off somewhat fast so if I tired of smelling like a cinnamon bun in the morning I could easily smell like gingerale(everyones fave, people would stop me and ask what it was!) in the evening.

My next "real" perfume was from MOR which I discovered in one of my favorite lady stores (as the Mister calls them) it was the bottle which caught my eye, then the name and then the scent.

Marshmallow oddly enough is a floral. Go figure. It has a slight sweet candy smell too it but nothing that would hint at actual marshmallows. But isn't the bottle so purty? They just recently relaunched it and although the bottle is still the same the label is different. Hopefully they didn't mess with the formula.

Did I mention that other than the Lolita Lempicka every single other perfume I have ever received has been a gift from The Mister?

Currently I'm wearing Estee Lauder Pleasures Delight. Which was bought for me even though I had only read the notes! I knew it would smell wonderful and mentioned the notes to The Mister and it magically appeared! Every time I hug someone they tell me I smell so good and go in for another hug, so I obviously made a good call.

Wow I ramble.

The point(yes there is a point!) of this is I'm wondering if I should get a new perfume to mark the occasion. Something truly special that will remind The Mister of the day we got hitched every time I wear it. I recently tried on one of the Tom Ford Private Blends, Neroli Portofino, and it was glorious. It blended down into a warm sensual smell that made me want to wrap myself in silk and cashmere and drink champagne. At 200 dollars a bottle though...might be something to put on my Christmas list. Then theres Bvlgari Jasmine Noir, with notes of gardenia, jasmine and licorice just smells sexy.

Then theres the coveted Chanel Exclusifs Boutiques range...that I have only smelled once but was enamored at first smell. Or the many Bond.no9 that I have exhausted my nose smelling.
How is a girl to choose?

Two good things in two days!

2009-08-28T09:51:00.004-04:00

Right now I'm dying. Sick, sick, sick. My face is full of grossness and I'm cold and then hot and then cold and seeing bright lights due to the cold medicine I've taken. Weeeee!

Yesterday The Mister cheered me up by surprising me with a gift certificate for a very fancy lingerie store! I'm going to be rocking some fine french underpants on our wedding day!
Going there next week for a proper bra fitting. I've had it done before but it's been a while, should be interesting to see if theres a difference.

Today we went and picked out rings. At first it looked like we would have to have mine custom made which was going to cost $$$. The guy helping us was the owners younger brother(I think) and they were just opening when we went in. It looked like we were going to be dropping some large bills on my band(dang custom engagement ring!) then The Mister points into a box and goes "what about that one?" and of the little brother pulls it out for me and it fits perfectly and looks perfect with my ring! Hooray!

The Mister went with titanium. Small thin band. He decided on titanium due to it's strength and durability. It's plain and simple just like he wanted. My band is a white gold knife edge to match the band on my engagement ring. Both rings came in at.......240, the fact that I found something that was in stock and didn't have to be custom made just resized saved us about 400 bucks!

So thank goodness for The Misters eagle eye!

Twenty Four (it's a good show I hear.)

2009-08-26T20:24:00.007-04:00

Twenty four days.

About this time 10 years ago I was writing sappy, love struck, melodramatic things in my journal. Something about his blond curls or blue eyes or his perfect lips. Oh and I was moving back home in a few weeks. We both knew this but it didn't stop us from hanging out all of the time. It was a feverish end of summer affair. I think at first we both thought that I would leave and that would be the end. Except by the time I did roll out of town I was praying to every God that would listen that he would call me soon. He called the next day.

My friends and my mother told me to forget about him, move on etc. But I knew. I knew already.

He asked me one night during one of our hours long phone calls if I'd be his girlfriend, something a guy hadn't done since...hmm maybe early high school? Heck it might have been even grade school! I giggled and said yes.

We declared our love about a month after that, the first time we saw each other since I'd moved.
We moved in together 5 months after that. We haven't been apart since.

Ten years. Not always perfect or easy but what relationship is? We have our problems and issues and we work through them because we love each other so very much.

Ten years and 5 days after he asked me to be his girlfriend he's going to promise to be my husband.

Let there be music!

2009-08-22T18:26:00.004-04:00

On Friday we got a registered letter in the mail confirming that we are indeed getting married on September 19th. It had some useful information (seriously that's what it said!) like we should arrive 10 minutes before our ceremony, bring two witnesses and ID and that we could bring a cd of music to play! MUSIC! OF OUR CHOICE!!!

I already know what the first song on the cd is going to be.

A string version of Morrissey's "Please, Please, Please Let Me Get What I Want"

I love this song with the lyrics but they are a touch too....maudlin for a wedding. Without lyrics and with strings it becomes incredibly beautiful and perfect.

I'll also include "Time After Time" no, not that one from the 80's that we all know and love but the older jazz standard sung here by Chet Baker. We have a version of Dusty Springfield singing it that is phenomenal.

I remember being young and thinking the Beach Boys were a lame band. Of course this had to do with my limited knowledge of them and thinking all the songs were like Kokomo or Barbara Ann. The Mister opened my ears to Pet Sounds and Smile(put out by Brian Wilson.) if you have never heard either of these albums do yourself a favor and give them a whirl. The most heartbreaking of songs though has to be "Our Prayer" to think that this is the same band that later put out the schmaltz that it Kokomo is flabbergasting. (apologies if you happen to like Kokomo.) The Beach Boys also have the song "God Only Knows" how perfect is that for a first dance?

Then some classics from MGM musicals...

"Love Is Here To Stay" sung by Gene Kelly from An American in Paris...

"All Of You" sung by Fred Astaire from Silk Stockings...

"Moon River" sung by Audrey Hepburn(who else?!) oh and "He Loves, She Loves" from Funny Face of course!

Oh and then some Big Star "I'm In Love With a Girl"

I could go on and on and on but I'll save it for another post!

I'm not sure how long to make the cd, I think I'll only need about 30 minutes but just to be safe I'll probably put about an hours worth of music on there, then when we have our reception party next year I'll already have an hours worth of cocktail music!

31 more days!

2009-08-19T13:10:00.009-04:00

I had a semi wedding related dream last night. I was looking for the perfect lipstick and I had found it, it was a little pot of glossy rosy/brown/gold colour and when I tried it on it made my lips full and perfect. It was magical. So of course I was going to buy it but then the sales lady gave me the wrong one. She gave me a glossy Barbie pink pot and told me it was the one I had tried on. I was so distraught, mostly because I had of course left this until the day of the ceremony.

Of course I haven't found the perfect lipstick. Although it might be somewhere in the suitcase sized makeup case I have or the smaller (but still bigger than a shoe box) sized case. I have a lot of makeup.

I've had this photo in my folders for a while now. I'm not sure where it's from, I had Googled "Classic makeup" and it came up.

It's a pretty straight forward look, easy to pull off but also easy to mess up. The lips could be too red and the eyes too dark instantly giving off an 80's vibe. I'm fairly confident in my makeup artist skills, I have after all done the wedding makeup of all my friends for the last ten years as well as all the special occasions that have come up in the past...oh 15 or so years? Not to mention all the ladies nights where I plastered on the slap to various girls working from books and magazines to achieve a certain look. These nights were sometimes disastrous as a few drinks in I find I start going a wee bit over board!

Makeup is something I enjoy doing. I don't do it professionally, although I did go to school for hair and makeup I found I didn't really enjoy dealing with strangers. Guess all those years of being told not to talk to them really etched itself into my brain!

The next photo(from the same folder, from the same search.) Is a variation on the look above. It's obviously more glam but really the only difference is a darker lip and eyeliner. Perhaps a different shade of eyeshadow. I love that the simplest changes in tone and colour and such make for a completely different look.

It's classic. It's glamorous and it's sexy. I'm a big fan of a dark lip. This look is also much more matte than the previous. Something that may be hard to pull off mid September when the weather can still be hot and humid. I wear matte foundation in the winter months only. Once summer comes the slightest hint of humidity and that results in a weird cakey mask of oil and sweat and makeup sitting on my face fighting each other. No one wins that war.

Once summer comes I mix up an spf moisturiser with some foundation and a pearly highlighting cream. It's sheer and illuminating and keeps the cancer away.

Ahh the smokey eye.

Who doesn't think it's a sexy look? If done properly it looks stunning...if not...well I see a lot of girls who don't do it properly and I want to scrub their faces clean. A proper smokey eye shouldn't look like you got into a fight with a can of black paint and lost. Eyeliner is not a right it's a privilege! You can barely, barely see the thin line on the top lip. and the bottom is just smudged with the same grey silver shade. It's lovely.

The lips are barely there, a shimmery gloss is all that's needed and there's a hint of blush.

It is sadly probably a bit much for a 1:30 elopement but perhaps a quick trip to change right before dinner that evening could be arranged. Although a trip to the hotel after were married...well...uh..er..I might have to do my makeup.

Dress hunt continues.

2009-08-17T16:37:00.003-04:00

The dress hunt continues....
T minus 5 weeks to go.

My friend E (who is also one half of our witnesses) saw the dress in the previous post and confirmed what was already swirling in my mind, that although it was a lovely dress that cut was bound to just make my large hips look even larger, she didn't say it like that of course.

Sigh.

Then today I went and tried on a similar dress at BCBG and it was not nice so it's vetoed.

I know exactly what I would like just from all the various dresses I did try on.

Sweetheart or V neckline.
corseted back.
A line or empire waist.
Something floaty and swingy.
Not much bedazzling(a little bling is nice.)
Something with dots would be extra nice.
Knee length or floor length.

If you know of a dress that has at at least two of these assets please point me in the right direction!

On a whim I went into a bridal shop near my house that has samples for sale. I wasn't going to try one one but I did. It was beautiful. It was also half price! Unfortunately the original price was 2700 dollars. Sigh.

Signed, Sealed, Delivered.

2009-08-12T16:53:00.002-04:00

The form that the Montreal court sent back needed to be signed by a witness in front of a notary. The Mister called a few places and they were all in the 40-50 dollar range. Thank goodness for Google because I did a search for a notary near my work and found one that was close by AND only charged 12 dollars.

The forms were signed and stamped in about 3 minutes. Imagine paying 50 dollars for that? I'd feel robbed!

So it's official. We elope in Montreal in just over a month! EEEEP!

I have a confession though. I cannot stop looking at dresses. This Mori Lee on the right recently popped up on my screen and I kind of love it. It's plain as can be and floaty. As we all know I will be retrying on the dress I bought next week. If I love it again then HOORAY!!!!! But if I still want to cry then....well this Mori Lee might be getting get an owner.

Photo from Mori Lee

Backyard reception!

2009-08-12T11:54:00.004-04:00

Oh my sweet Sunday! This wedding is everything I want my reception to be!
Sweet, lovely, small.

Seriously check it out....

Once Wed

and from the source....

Scout Holiday

Photo from Scout Holiday

I love seeing backyard weddings like this. It gives me hope for planning ours!

How does your garden grow.....

2009-08-07T10:31:00.003-04:00

I have always known that I would do my own flowers. Flower arranging is something I've always been rather good at right up there with flower growing. For years I even arranged flowers for the office I worked in, I was given a budget each week and I would trek out to the flower markets on a Monday morning and then make a different arrangement every week. Clients always asked what florist we used. When I was a kid I would check out books on flower arranging from the library on a regular basis. I would love to be a professional florist maybe that's my calling.

In spring I planted a whole bunch of dahlias and in the past week some of them have started blooming. And boy are they beautiful. As an organic gardener I'm never sure how something will turn out, I'm constantly at war with various critters who think I've planted a delicious buffet just for them. I use companion plants that are known to repell inscects and other beneficial bugs that come in and eat the bad bugs. I'm the captain of my own lady bug army!

I should be able to use all flowers from my garden for my bouquet(fingers crossed that theres no freak hail storms!) flowers a grew myself that will be back every year around the same time so I can create my bouquet every year for free!

Got a letter in the mail...

2009-08-06T10:07:00.002-04:00

This morning as I got off the subway my cell rang. The Mister is home this week installing our new wood floors(YAY!!!) and he was calling to tell me that we got some mail.
From Montreal.

Apparently we need to fill out one more form, one that when we called before they told us NOT to fill out. Sigh.

BUT...we have lots of time to get it back AND more importantly we have a date and time booked just for us!

September 19th at 1:30pm!

Only a half hour before 2pm, the time I dreamt we had! Ohhh!

We are going to call them tomorrow as I am also home and sort out this mystery form, but other than that slight(please, please let it be slight!) snag it's all a go!

Wow.

I'm getting married.

In 44 days.

Day by day.

2009-08-04T14:37:00.003-04:00

Since not fitting in my dress a few weeks back I have been looking a backup. Just in case. Which led me to this dress. From BCBG. You cannot tell from this photo but it has polka dots. swoon.

I said I'd give my dress a month to fit. So I still have two weeks to go, but everything feels so urgent and well in my case it is!

We still haven't heard from Montreal. Every time I check my email or my phone rings I think "Please let it be someone french."

I'm getting increasingly anxious by the day!

Luckily Mother Nature has decided ease my nerves by springing into action in my garden. It's bursting with blooms! Did you know Chocolate Cosmos smell like chocolate? Brilliant! The dahlias are delectable! And it's all going to get better!

Is that a four?

2009-07-31T11:57:00.003-04:00

I'm sitting here staring at that four. I haven't been below 155 in a very long time. I'm thrilled and excited even though I'm only like .2 away from 155 it's still very satisfying to see that four appear.

I started the Wild Rose D-tox on Monday. I thought it would be harder and that I would be starving and craving and grumpy. But I'm not. Nope I feel amazing.

In the past 5 days I have slept better than I have in ages, I've got more energy than I know what to do with and I'm eating foods I really enjoy.

As part of the "moving is losing" regime I've started doing squats after every time I go to the washroom. Weird I know, but why not? While I'm drying my hands I do 15 squats if there is no one else in the washroom. Luckily I only work with 6 other girls so there rarely is. Since I drink a lot of water, I'd say about 15 SIG bottles during work, I use the washroom A LOT. At least 8 times a day. Which means I'm getting in 120 squats a day and it takes about 30 extra seconds or so.

I'm also stretching a lot more. For about 30 minutes in the evening while watching tv.

I do The Reg that I mention last week then I do a bunch of tricep moves then lots of stretching. Everyone should stretch, it's really important, probably more than we know. It keeps us limber and makes our muscles less likely to spaz out and cause us pain. It also lenghtens our muscles, it's one of the reasons ballet dancers and yogis always look so amazing! So if you do one thing this week stretch!

Let them eat cake!

2009-07-29T11:29:00.004-04:00

One of the easiest choices to make was to get a cake or cupcakes from Cocoa Locale in Montreal.

The last time we went we trekked up to this bakery with intentions of getting some cupcakes, instead we got a wee cake! It was beyond delish and our intentions of saving some for the ride home were quickly thrown out the window! I think we had a banana cake, but I remember for sure, we are suckers for a good banana cake! It's a one woman show at Cocoa Locale, everything is baked fresh each day and once she's sold out the shop is closed..and apparently she sells out often!

(Both photos from Google images.)

Look at how cute the shop is too! It's beyond adorable! Obviously some photos need to be taken in there! I hope they aren't sold out by the time we get there!

Waiting and waiting....

2009-07-28T11:10:00.003-04:00

I'm sitting here compulsively checking my email and cellphone waiting for the folks up at the Montreal Bureau de Mariage to tell me if we are getting married and if so at what time!

I had a dream that they called me and asked if I wanted 9am or 2pm, I picked 2pm. Except they won't ask me what time I want they will just give us the slot that is open. Every day that passes makes me more anxious. We are at the mercy of a civil worker!

AAAAAH!

One of the things that I think is quite cute about getting married in Montreal is that the courthouse has a room called the Salle de Celebration! Literally the Celebration Room! Who wouldn't want to get married in a room called that?

September is tumbling towards us at breakneck speed. In fact if everything goes to plan I will be married in 53 days. Five Three! Woah. Funnily enough I didn't even realise how many 9's were in the date. 9/19/09!

I admit that I've had some jitters. As we all know I'm a bit of a flake sometimes, most of those times seem to happen after seeing a beautiful wedding on a blog with photos that are stunningly beautiful. Then I snap back to reality when I remember that a) those weddings cost pots of money and b) I'm still having a reception at some point(most likely next summer)

The fact that it's all in someone else's hands (for now) makes my shoulders fall back from my ears.

I do know some things that will be happening in Montreal. I will eat all my favorite things! I will be happy to be in my favorite city! I will drink many different beers! I will sleep in the same hotel that John and Yoko did so many years ago!

I want it!

2009-07-27T16:55:00.004-04:00

Several weeks ago I attended one of my bff mom's 60th birthday. It was at this party that her older sister let me take a look at her camera. It was at this party that I started mentally trying to justify going straight to the nearest camera store and buying it. Let me introduce you to my new obsession.....

The Canon G10.

It's 14 megapixels! It has a manual option! I can buy different lenses and filters for it! It has a hot shoe! It's like an SLR without the neck pain!

Oh and it's over 500 dollars. Wahhh.

Now I have a digital camera. One that was really good when I bought it 4 years ago. I held out for a long time on the digital camera so I did a lot of research before actually buying one. But recently it's been acting crazy. It seems to zap the power out of batteries in a New York minute and some times the photos are just not there or the memory card acts like a jerk. So many signs that it's nearing the end of it's short technological life.

I have a film SLR which The Mister bought me for my birthday one year and I was a film purist up until the digital. I used to even develop my own film in a dark room and everything. I can still smell the weird vinegary scent of the chemicals! I like that film is film, I never had to buy a new camera because it became obsolete after a year.

Then one day I was going on a trip. There would be hiking and lots of walking and maybe it was wiser to just get a small digital camera. My analog days were numbered.

I still love film. I have several vintage cameras and a medium format camera and toy cameras that make photos look really cool. I miss the days though when I carried a camera around with me all the time.

I would really like to have this for Montreal. A good camera makes all the difference.

So I really want the Canon G10, maybe I'll luck out and it will go on sale for half price!

It's back!

2009-07-24T09:56:00.003-04:00

I didn't take a pic earlier this week but it read 159 on Monday. This week I have cut back on the sugar, sodium, flour, coffee and processed foods. I clocked in at least 10000 steps a day each day, one day I even came in just over 15000. I read somewhere the quote "If your moving your losing." and I keep repeating this in my head. Which is probably why the mister is giving me weird looks because I'm doing squats and crunches while watching tv! I feel better already, although I swear if you opened my fridge you would think I was nuts! I've got about 10 containers of berries in there right now and several containers of nut butters and so much fruit!

One of my best friends is back in town and I'm hoping to cheer her up with some physical activity outings. Some girls need ice cream and a bottle of wine but Savs is basically a guru of healthy things. She's a Kundalini yoga teacher, extremely talented tarot card reader, fitness buff and all around awesome woman. She's the one that taught me "The Reg".

What is The Reg? Well she learned it from when she was taking Gatka (seriously she's a ninja!) and it's pretty much awesome!

You start at 10 reps and each round you do one less.

So you do 10 squats, 10 push ups, 10 crunches, with no stopping between.

Then 9 of each, 8, 7 and so on, at around the 7 or 6 mark you want to cry then once you hit 4 your like "this is cake!"

It takes about 7 minutes or so and when your all done you've done 55 of each.

The Reg is the reason I can do push ups on my toes now!! I decided last night to do it every day maybe even more than once or I might tweak it a bit and do two sets of each number. I added weights to it last night doing squat presses etc. I highly recommend it to everyone, it's simple, fast and you don't need anything but yourself to do it!

That sound you heard...

2009-07-23T10:22:00.004-04:00

If by chance you heard a noise last night that sounded like a mix between growling/sighing/despair it was probably me. I decided last night to try on my dress.
I hadn't tried it since I bought it so I thought I would.

It didn't fit. It didn't zip up and it wasn't just me being awkward with the self zipping of a dress there was no way in hades that it was going to zip. AND my hips looked like two giant shelves. My waist looked tiny but the hips were like I shoved two extra loaves of bread up under the dress, giant loaves of yummy italian bread..mmmm. um.
My waist was itsy bitsy though. I kind of looked like this....

image from Google.

Which really isn't the look I want at all.

Honestly though if I've gained weight since then it's been very little, maybe a pound or two, but I've gained muscle and things have shifted around a bit and the dress...it doesn't fit or look nice at all.

My first instinct was to burst into tears. Because that is the rational thing to do right? I didn't though instead I took the dress off, swore under my breath, hung it back in the closet and gave it some thought. Then I watched Coraline in 3D which took my mind off it for a while.

Then I laid in bed coming up with a plan. That's all I need right?

I've got just under 2 months. I work well under pressure!

This whole week has been spent just weaning myself off coffee and eating incredibly healthy. I've barely had any sugar, flour or processed foods. I'm preping myself for the detox kit next week. I'm going to continue eating this way for the next two months. I'm going to hit the gym more and start doing some exercise in the morning. I'm going to see where I am in terms of the dress in one month.

If I still am not feeling it I'm going to start looking for another one.

The main thing is that I don't panic. Instead I need to let this kick my butt into high gear.

Two dreams...one comes true!

2009-07-22T10:05:00.003-04:00

Last night I had my first wedding dream......

The Mister and I were in Montreal at a Marche shopping for cheese and suddenly I realise that we are suppose to get married that day! I ask for the time and it's 4pm and I know that the last civil ceremony of the day is at 4:30pm so I go "Well I guess were not getting married!"
Then suddenly I'm thinking "I don't even have a bra to wear! Oh well I just wear the one I'm wearing, even though it's dirty." I woke up and instantly thought "Oh yeah I have to buy a new bra!"

When I was a little girl I was obsessed with what is now known as the Fairmont chain of hotels. In Toronto it's the Royal York, Quebec City has the Chateau Frontenac and in Montreal the Queen Elizabeth. I don't remember who but someone told me that when Royalty comes to visit that is where they always stay! I was in awe of these hotels because they were giant beautiful old buildings that had balls for important people and in my mind were the fanciest hotels in the world. I desperately wanted to stay at them. I tried in vain to get my parents to stay in them for just one night, but we never did.

Where am I going with this? Well I have been looking for a hotel for the last week or so trying to find a good deal. For some reason Montreal is one of the more expensive cities for hotels. We got every year and every year I find a deal for a room for under a hundred dollars. We don't spend much time in the room so we don't really need to have much more than a bed and a washroom. Thing is we also tend to go during off season, so everything is cheaper.
Nothing was coming up. Or more correctly lots of horrid hotels were coming up. As much as I would love to stay in a one star hotel with reviews of dirty linens, mean staff and loud neighbours.

Then last night I was on hotels.ca and I organized my search from low to high in price and what should come up? The Fairmont Queen Elizabeth! For 95 dollars a night! It was some timed deal so we booked it right then and there!

So finally I get to stay where at one of my childhood dream hotels! Not to mention this is the hotel where John Lennon and Yoko Ono had their famous bed in! This is the hotel where they recorded "Give Peace a Chance"! Best of all were saving over 250 dollars on our stay!
That's 250 dollars I can spend on shoes!

Red shoes!

2009-07-21T09:41:00.003-04:00

Type Z "Jade" $39.55

RSVP "Lexi" $15.62(on sale!)

Promiscuous "Celebrate" $59.00

Delman "Sema-T" $184.30(on sale, normally $354.00)

All photos and shoes from Zappos.com
All prices in USD.

After realising that my dress wasn't made of crocheted rope I instantly started focusing on accessories. Because I know I'll have a hard time finding them I started my search for the perfect red shoes. Just like finding the perfect red lipstick, finding the perfect red shoe might be a difficult task. Do I want a deep red or a bright red? I thought I was going to go with satin, but I'm also drawn to the suede shoes at the top!

I have to admit my biggest crush is on the Delman. First off they are practically 50% off, I'm not sure I could spend 354 dollars on shoes, but 184 for shoes that are worth 354 well that's a deal that I dig.

I've never bought shoes over the internet, I have a hard time buying shoes in person. My foot fits shoes from size 8 to size 10! I know most sites offer no hassle returns so that makes me feel slightly better!

Here is the Delman from the front and top, just so you can see the detail on the toe....

And I exhaled and all was well...

2009-07-20T09:12:00.002-04:00

Funny story....

I picked up my dress and saw it for the first time since the previous posts photo was taken.
For some reason in my head I had transformed it into a thickly crocheted lace dress, probably because The Mister mentioned a doily and I started thinking about how doilies look and how thick they were and how they were never white they were always off white and I transformed that dress in my head into a sort of ropey thick crocheted thing that I was sure was going to be off white. So I was actually surprised when I pulled back the garment bag and saw that it wasn't thick crochet lace but very thin delicate silk threads that made the lace and it was diamond white. I don't know how I could mutated it in my head so badly! Oddly enough I don't think it really looks like it does in that photo! I literally sighed with relief when I saw how beautiful it was! Phew!

As both The Canadian Bride and Always a Bridesmaid commented it doesn't need any embellishment, which I knew in my heart, but when you get on Etsy you suddenly become irrational and want practically everything! I doubt I'll wear the organza lab jacket or convert it into something else. I might pick up a nice light summer cashmere sweater because it could be chilly in the evening and my body temperature is always out of whack!

The only jewellery I'm going to be wearing is going to be my Nanny's charm bracelet. I'm not sure if I'll wear it on my wrist or wrap it around my bouquet but I need her with me. It makes a lot of noise but every charm on it has a story and it was my favorite thing in the world when I was small and I'd beg her to show me the charm bracelet and tell me the stories of each charm. She gave it to me the year she died and I've never actually worn it in public, I'm terrified I'll lose it but I always knew I'd wear it on my wedding day no matter what my outfit.

I don't really wear jewellery that much, even though I do have a really amazing pink pearl necklace that I got for Christmas one year. Which was really a surprise as I had seen it in a Birks ad in the Globe and Mail and just sort of randomly pointed at it(which I do a lot!) and said "Oh that's nice!" and then completely forgot about it! I also have a silver Tiffany's bracelet but I don't really wear that either.

I'm now on the hunt for shoes, definitely coloured shoes, that's something I always wanted no matter what! I'm also thinking I may need a pair of flats for walking Montreal in, I'm determined to wear my outfit all day!

I'm thinking of making my veil/fascinator but as I said Etsy lures me with it's Siren song!

I've got two months. Plenty of time right!

I feel like there may be some voting going on though because I like opinions and sometimes I'm easily led astray!

A little oh la la!

2009-07-17T11:04:00.003-04:00

Remember this dress? The one I bought that the Mister saw and said it looked like a doily? The one I actually haven't seen since this photo was taken because it's been in the safe keeping of my bff?

Well I'm finally picking it up this weekend and bringing it home.

And I'm scared. I'm scared that I'm going to see it again and be underwhelmed by it. Although I keep scrolling up and looking at that photo and thinking "Dang I look hawt despite my mutton leg arms"

But I feel like I need to add something to it.

A belt that ties in a bow at the back? A pretty shrug? Some wrist length gloves? I'm completely unsure what but I feel it is lacking something.

It does come with an organza jacket that looks like a lab coat. A very pretty lab coat but a lab coat none the less. I'm wondering if I could rework it into something less....medical and into something more unique and sofisticated. Like this.....

From Etsy seller Modern Romance

Who also made this one which is simpler so it probably would look better with my dress....

That second one is all sorts of dramatic and I like that. A lot. If I'm going to elope I'm going to dress as eccentric and dramatic as possible! If I'm going to take that leap I'm going to do it my way!

You only live once right?!

Game changer.

2009-07-16T14:23:00.003-04:00

I've probably mentioned it before but I LOVE Montreal. From the very first time I ever went when I was 14/15 I was smitten and have visited about once a year since then. It's "our" city, a place that is close to home but also seems worlds away and over the years we have become Montreal connoisseurs, trekking all over the city to find what we are looking for which in most cases is something edible. We routinely return home with our bags full of beers, bagels, cheeses and anything we have never seen in Ontario.

Le Cheval Blanche brewpub. Photo by me.

We visit brew pubs, bakeries, markets, churches and generally wander around in bliss. When we first got engaged we wanted to get married there but the requirements and laws sort of made it hard. You had to go in for an interview with a clerk before getting married and then they would let you know if your date and time were accepted. You could not change the date, place or time the ceremony HAD to take place when and where you said it was going to be or else! It was a lot of stress that was unnecessary.

Then I started planning something else, which as we all know didn't work out either. In fact the anxiety and misery wedding planning caused me was greater than I've ever let on here. It wasn't that I didn't know what to do or what I wanted, in fact right now I could easily plan out about 20 weddings if someone asked me to. As long as they weren't mine, it distressed me that the Mister had no interest in our wedding and I was left to do it all by myself without any feedback. I admit I was crying at work and in public, it was not a very good time for me. So I cancelled everything.

I cancelled it all and was instantly happier. Just last night a good friend even said "You know I said to my husband, haven't you noticed how much happier she is?" and he had.

So...uh...what was I talking about? Oh Montreal! This year for the first time we are going with another couple, who are excited to come with us because of our extensive knowledge and love of the city. We decided to go in September, too many festivals during the summer and the weather in September is usually always perfect.

I jokingly said to The Mister "Too bad we can't just elope then. Silly laws!" Two days later he forwarded me an email which had a bunch of attachments I opened the first one. "Dear Future Spouses" it read, "We have recently changed the laws and no longer require an interview"

Game changer! Yes there are still a bunch of rules and laws that have to be followed. We are still unsure about what were going to do. I have visions in my head of what I would want our wedding to be but I also just want to get married and get on with life, there are houses to reno and babies to be had and careers to work on. There are things that I'm not willing to wait for and things I am.

Will we elope? Were not sure yet. But it's definitely in the cards now.

Do the detox!(sung to "Do the Hustle")

2009-07-13T18:36:00.004-04:00

Remember how I was taking photos every Friday of my scale? No? Well I was and then...I stopped. The lowest the scale said was 155.something but I seemed to be stuck at around 156-159.
I now rest at 159.

I've been meaning to do a diet detox for months now and just haven't found a "good time", but you know what? There's never going to be a "good time", there's always going to be something so next Monday I will start the Wild Rose Detox kit that has been sitting up in my cupboard, the same cupboard that currently holds every snack food known to man kind.

I'm not doing it to lose weight. I'm doing it to kick start my 21 days of clean eating. Why 21? Well they say a habit takes 21 days to form (and break!) The Wild Rose kit only fills 12 days but I'm going to continue to eat the same after I'm done the supplements that they provide you. I'm giving up sugars, gluten, dairy(oh sweet, sweet cheese I am so sorry for abandoning you...) and of course processed foods. Not to mention alcohol and caffeine. Yes my coworkers are going to LOVE me! I will probably bring back alcohol and dairy after the 12 days, but keep it organic! Seriously giving up alcohol during prime patio season in a country that has only 3.5 months of summer is suicide!

Summer is the perfect time to do a cleanse because the cheap local produce is abundant! There are farmers markets everywhere and grocery stores are bursting with deals like 3 pints of blueberries for 5 dollars!

I've decided that the rest of the summer is going to be devoted to getting in the best shape of my life, cleaning up my diet and having a really fun time.

Notes.

2009-07-10T09:45:00.002-04:00

I have been keeping a little notebook so that when I think of something I can write it down. A majority of my note taking seems to happen on my commute each day. I highly recommend carrying a note book on you at all times especially if like me you are easily distracted by shiny things and instantly forget your amazing ideas!

Sometimes I write down single words, sometimes I write whole paragraphs and I have been looking at them and seeing similarities.

Here are some of my notes.

Opulent Rustic Intimate Entertaining Decadent Homey Elegant Fun Inviting

Long rectangular tables, local food served family style, vintage table linens, low over flowing centerpieces, simple homemade desserts, low lighting, vintage party games. Think about Noel Coward having a dinner party for his closest friends.

I'm slowly forming an idea. I'm trying not to be dazzled by all the amazing, lovely and stunning websites that somehow make me forget that we do have a budget(although were not sure what yet!) and that budget does not include having a team of planners come up with something really amazing. I think a lot of brides to be forget that a lot of what they see is not done by the bride alone but by a team of creative experts, yes occasionally there are some genuine DIY magical brides and I applaud them to the moon and back because by gum they are inspiring!

If you can drink it with a bendy straw then I'm in!

2009-07-09T09:32:00.005-04:00

I know it's cliche but I adore champagne. Ever since my first sip which was on New Years Eve when the 90's started(which makes me feel très vieux! I wasn't drinking age but I was dating age.) I remember thinking "this should run out of the taps!" It's not something I drink very often but for celebrations I believe they are a must! I have some vintage champagne glasses like the ones on the record cover above they are also handy for serving desserts!

I remember the first time I saw a mini bottle of champers. It basically ticked off all the boxes on the list of things I like! Small! Cute! Drinkable with a bendy straw! Yes I am that easy to please! Sadly I've never actually had my very own. The few times I've set my mind to picking them up seem to be the few times they are all sold out! Boo! I love the bottles above with the little wrist straps just so you won't lose it! Hee!

The last time I popped across the border we went to this amazing liquor store the kind of store that I thought only existed in my dreams! It was the size of my local grocery store and it had another smaller store attached to it just for beer and gourmet foods. There I spied for the first time the Sofia minis. I hemmed and hawed over buying them and in the end decided that the 97 bottles of different beers we were bringing back would be enough! Next time though I'm not leaving without them! That and the pre-made martinis that came in a plastic martini glass! You peeled off the top and drank! Convenience at it's best!

I'm sort of in love with the packaging of the Sofia. I'd love to have a toast where every one has their own wee can, it's slightly cutesy and slightly trashy which I think is perfectly me!

The Nanette Lepore!

2009-07-06T10:08:00.002-04:00

So...there it is! The Nanette Lepore in action! It looks like I'm gazing down at my cleavage, but really I'm listening to someone talking. I swear when I left my house my hair was BIG and blown out and giant rollered and sprayed, but the weather (above freezing) and my baby fine hair decided that less is more and instantly fell flat. Another funny thing is that I'm wearing my glasses. I tend to take them off for photos, even though they are one of the priciest items I own. Any how there it is! Now I just need some more places to wear it!

Sorry!

2009-06-28T21:49:00.002-04:00

Sorry there hasn't been much posting, I've been slowly editing the photos from the wedding I went to on my birthday! This is one of my favorite photos of the day.

Loves it!

2009-06-25T11:10:00.003-04:00

One of the things I cannot resist is vintage cook books. Books written in a time when things like lard and fat were common ingredients and lobster, whipped cream, scallops, chicken and peaches all appeared in the same recipe! I love looking at the "casual" parties that housewives of yore were instructed to whip together and at the same time look calm, happy and stylish.
Don't you love how happy the woman in the first photo is? It's breakfast on the patio! She's already fully dressed and coiffed and has presumably made muffins, two omelets, some meat looking things and a pot of coffee! AND she's not even eating! He's totally digging in like the hungry man he his but you know she's totally just having coffee for breakfast and maybe some Valium to help take the edge off. Also she's having her coffee black because sugar and cream will obviously go straight to her hips! I love it! I love the deck with the yellow flowers and orange table set. LOVE IT!

Then there is that cake! Which is like it says "Pure Gold"!! I used to browse my moms cake cook books all the time when I was a kid. I'm not sure why she had so many because she certainly didn't just make cakes! How sweet would it be to have just another tier on top of this one with the simple piping? Although you'd lose that chilled out sun who makes me happy with his whole "I am the sun, be happy, stay tanned" vibe. I dig that sun.

Oh and look everything is orange and yellow!

I got it...yeah baby I got it!

2009-06-19T23:48:00.004-04:00

I am happy to announce that I'm excited about weddings again! HOORAY!

Honestly I was pretty over it for a bit.(as if you couldn't tell!) and wasn't sure if I could get my mojo back.

I just needed a bit of a break to regroup and breathe a bit.

Phew!
Because there are dresses like this to look at!

Things we like.

2009-06-19T16:28:00.002-04:00

Psychedelic illustrations.

The Mister is a HUGE Beatles fan and collector and I was raised by hippies and my dad was an artist who drew some pretty weird shizz back in the late 60's(he still has all his old sketch books and theres some far out stuff!) so as I kid I have a lot of fond memories of the music and art from this period. Looking at the art of Peter Max(bottom two) and the Sesame Street Pinball Counting segment make me feel happy and think that something really amazing is about to happen.

Swoon!

2009-06-19T09:43:00.003-04:00

I've been a BIG fan of Etsy.com for about 3 or 4 years now. I spend a lot of time just browsing around and saving sellers to my faves. I don't remember what I was looking for when I stumbled upon Whichgoose who makes natural crowns but when I saw these butterfly hair clips I fell head over heels. I personally would wear them a lot but also think that they would look super adorable in a flowergirls hair, especially so for an outdoor wedding!

Brace face...

2009-06-16T15:48:00.004-04:00

Well I realised yesterday that I should have been an orthodontist.

After what seemed like a very long time of having the orthodontist touch my teeth(seriously nothing is weirder than having your teeth fondled.) opening and closing my mouth and having my jaw wiggled into it's proper position he laid it down for me. He said a bunch of things about bites and crowding and asymmetry but the the two things he said that really stood out were this...
"Your looking at a year and a half to two years and the max cost would be 6300 for everything."

Huh.

He said it could be less but it wouldn't be any more than that, it really depended on my teeth.

Were talking old school silver braces here. My teeth don't even qualify for the Invisalign system.

I always wanted the silver ones though so it's cool.

Then he mentioned my jaw and how my bite is all sorts of messed up because my bottom jaw decided to stop growing before my top jaw did. I do sometimes notice if my mouth is closed all the way that my chin is off to one side. I tend to not close my mouth all the way because it starts to hurt my jaw. So this off side chin of mine could be fixed if it really bothered me...by breaking my jaw. Whoa right? That wouldn't happen until 6 months before my braces came off and as the Ortho said "It's not fun and you wouldn't want to go outside for about a week and you eat only liquids or mush for about 6 weeks."
It's something to think about but it would mean I didn't have to wear a night guard every night. Nothing sets the mood like a night guard.

I sort of have to get braces. At this point my teeth are shifting because I clench them while I sleep, the night guard just keeps them from wearing down, when I wake up in the morning I've clenched my teeth so hard that they are stuck in the guard and I have to pry them off. In the last little while it's been getting harder to actually chew, I have to have yogurt for breakfast because I honestly can't chew for the first few hours of my day.

But YIKES 6300 dollars is a lot of money! Of course he has a payment plan but I still need to come up with an extra 1300 for the initial payment. I'm seriously thinking of getting a part time job on weekends. Sigh.

It's Friday and it's June.

2009-06-12T21:01:00.003-04:00

Anyone still checking in on me?

So the wedding last weekend was lovely. It was an intimate affair at a restaurant. My dress was a smash, my shoes ate up the one toe that shoes ALWAYS seem to destroy for me. Seriously that one weird toe always gets so abused. To toot my own horn I looked and felt muy picante! I'm not even sure if that is Spanish.
I did score 3 small vases at the end of the night as per the brides insistence that we take home the centre pieces. I heart vases so I'm a happy girl.

I'm reading so many blogs of brides who are getting married soon and am so excited by and for them. All the while I'm trying to figure out what exactly it is that we want to do. I'm thinking next Spring to Fall. I'm basically giving us until September to figure it out. I'm going to buy a journal and write down all of our favorite things. I think our wedding should ultimately reflect who we are and the things we love. This may mean that we end up serving fish and chips in a garden while we listen to vintage soul music and I wear a crazy over the top gown...but it will be us and that is what I want most. Une célébration de nous.

I am the most indifferent bride, which honestly is truly surprising to me. Oh well. It's not that I don't care really, it's that there are so many things I could easily see us doing that I can't pick one.

In health news I get my ECG results next week, will I have a hole in my heart? Will I have to go get more tests? We shall see. I'm at peace with it now. What ever is going on is already doing so and worrying about it doesn't help it. Also I made an appointment with an orthodontist for a consult. Yes at the age of 32 I might just get braces. A good friend of mine once said something like "Five years is always going to be the same amount of time." We had been talking about school but it applies to everything. Time is time no matter how much we wish it wasn't so why put off things you truly want to do.

This post is really random and all over the place I apologize. I'm not saying it's the 3 glasses of white wine I've had...but you know..it's Friday and it's June.

Problem solved!

2009-06-06T13:13:00.004-04:00

Found shoes! Not the ones from the last post, I went out this morning to get them and decided to drop into Winners(TJ Maxx for any Americans) and there in the 81/2 aisle were these....

After a couple of text messages to my shoe obsessed sister I bought them. They were also 20 dollars cheaper than the Aldo ones! Hooray! Of course this means I now have to give myself a pedicure! Like right now!

Shoe problem!

2009-06-05T21:10:00.003-04:00

I just went and got about 3 inches of hair cut off. I needed it, but it's so weird to have shoulder length hair instead of it mid back. My stylist though is going to help me grow it back to that length but keep it looking nice and not like a scraggly witch wig.

Tomorrow I will be getting up at the crack of dawn and going shoe shopping. I went today and found a shoe I liked but of course the mate was missing. I was looking for a black satin heel that was also cheap. As I always do I browse the web for what I'm looking for and then head out. Aldo seemed to have several shoes that fit the bill so I headed there.

Don't you just hate it when a store doesn't have stuff from the website?

Honestly I didn't really look too hard, I had about 40 minutes to find something. I hit 4 stores in that time frame ending up at the Aldo outlet where they had a pair that were exactly what I was looking for, cute, open toe, black satin pumps. I ask for an 8 and 9. The sales guy comes out and says they only have a 5 and an 11. BOO. So I grab another shoe. One that has a hidden platform, closed square toe, also in black satin. He brings out the sizes and says he found the first shoe in a 9 with the new shoe! Hooray! I put the first shoe on and stand up and instantly think:

OUCH. OUCH. OUCH.

The open toe basically felt like a razor across my big toe. I tried on the other shoe on my other foot. I stand there with two different shoes on and think about if I could deal with the pain of the open toe. I finally snap the heck out of it, who buys shoes that instantly cause pain?!? I open the box to get the other shoe of the second shoe(you following?) and the box is empty. The sales guy comes over and says he's looking for it right now. While he's looking I fall more in love with the second shoe, it's comfortable, walkable and damn sexy. Everything a shoe should be.

Finally he comes back and shrugs "It's not on the shelves, it should be, but I can't find it."

Here is the shoe.

Obviously this isn't the satin one. Now they did have it in regular black leather and patent leather and I'm seriously thinking that it might just be worth it to get them in either of those.

If anyone is out there..please let me know what you think? Shiny black or matte black? Would shiny black be a bit too much?

Cancelling.

2009-06-04T13:12:00.002-04:00

Today I cancelled our photographer, luckily we hadn't signed anything or put a deposit down yet, but she had made up a contract and only because of bad timing we weren't able to get our deposit to her. Phew.
I also cancelled the tea. I'm waiting to hear back from the catering manager to see if we lose our deposit or not. If we do lose it I will see if they can move the tea to a different date and use it for some other event.

Cancelling things made me feel a pang of sadness and admittedly I teared up a bit. Right now though, after it's all been done. I feel relieved.

On top of my health being weird right now there were other things that lead me to cancel it. Delay it, I should say. It's delayed until I feel like having it!

The fact that one of my bff's wouldn't be able to attend really stung. That the original plan was to do it this way so we could fix up the house and have a child asap. I'd rather have my house renos all done or at least most of the main floor done. I want to enter my front door and feel like I'm at home and not just in a house that has gross beige carpet and 80's wallpaper. I want to love my house and I don't. Not one bit. The fact that music and food is such a big part of our lives and we weren't going to have any dancing made me feel like puking. There wasn't going to be the banana chocolate chip cake with dulce de leche filling and buttercream icing, which is a cake we came up with several years ago as what we MUST HAVE AT OUR WEDDING. I mean we were giving up a cake that we dreamt up before we were even engaged! All the reasons I have mentioned here in my various "Oh my god what the hell am I doing?!?!?!" posts.

I feel better and happier and confident that this is the right thing to do.

Tried it! Loved it!

2009-06-01T20:47:00.002-04:00

Image from Sephora

I'm in love with Stila's Pomegranate Lip and Cheek Stain. My lips are naturally red and this stain makes them look like I just drank some red wine whereas other tints I have tried have done nothing. Although I haven't yet tried it on my cheeks as I'm also pasty white and it might look a bit harsh.

I can't wait to wear it with my Nanette Lepore at my friends wedding this weekend. Just going to keep it simple with some shimmery pale eyeshadow, a touch of black eye liner and stained lips with clear balm on top. Red nails of course.

Please hold.

2009-05-29T09:12:00.007-04:00

So everything is on hold.

I'm actually really good with this. I actually feel really good about it.

With all the recent health stuff going on it seems like a smarter idea to wait and see what exactly is going on with that. These days I'm having episodes daily and adding extra stress of wedding planning just isn't worth putting myself at risk for.

Plus I recently discovered Melissa Sweet "Dora" seriously how did this dress slip by my polka dot radar?

Seriously that dress is the stuff I daydream about! Dora might just beat out the previous coveted polka dotted dress Rasharna from Maggie Sottero....

Results are in...

2009-05-26T12:53:00.002-04:00

And the diagnosis? More tests!
Well...on the bright side I don't have MS but I could have a hole in my heart that is letting little clots of blood slip up into my brain causing migraine auras without the migraine pain. I'm glad I don't have the migraine pain because if that's what I have I would be out of commission all of the time! It makes a bit of sense that this is the cause because I had a heart murmur when I was a child, which I was told I grew out of but it could just be a tiny hole now and inaudible and migraines run in my family so in a roundabout way it makes sense.

So I get to go for an EKG and some more blood work and then I wait for those results.

So high fives for not having MS but big thumbs down to having a hole in my heart and blood clots and such.

Tired beyond belief.

2009-05-25T13:01:00.002-04:00

I'm so tired today. Beyond tired. I might even be asleep as I type this.

I spent almost every daylight hour outside over the weekend. I spent all day Saturday gardening. Two of my plant orders came in on Friday and I had forgotten that I had ordered so many and on top of that both places sent me freebies so I had even more than I ordered AND I still need more!
Sunday we went to Spadina House(the house in the previous post.) as it was part of Door Open Toronto so we didn't have to pay entrance fees. The sun room was off limits but we were able to peak in through the windows. It was nice enough. The gardens though made me happy. There's an apple orchard. Could we have the ceremony there? There would be apples on the trees then!

We spent the rest of the day reading things and listening to music on our deck. I think this is why I feel so out of it today, it's the same feeling I get when I go to the cottage. Too much fresh air and sunshine tire me out!

A ceremony site...

2009-05-21T15:43:00.003-04:00

Well I think we finally might have found a place for the ceremony. Funnily enough it was sort of our first choice but we had to wait until the city got back to us and if you've ever dealt with a city employee you know that takes patience!

It's going to cost us about 325 after it's all done only because we want to have a toast and if you want to serve alcohol you have to pay an extra 110 dollars for a permit and insurance. BOO.

See that little sunroom at the bottom left corner of the house? It would be in there.

It might be blazing hot though. Which I only thought about right this second as I was just outside where it is a balmy 25degrees out and I was tres warm. BUT the garden, no wait...THE APPLE ORCHARD!!! for photos? Yes freaking please!! What makes me happy about this location too is that the room needs some sprucing up. Which means????? I get to do some little DIY projects!

Hooray!

Bored and Indifferent.

2009-05-20T10:23:00.002-04:00

I feel like I should change the title of this blog to something like "Emotionless Weddings" or "Complaining about Weddings" something of that ilk. I read all these other blogs written by these excited brides who are all planning these lovely events and I think "Oh I wish I was doing that! I wish I was excited and giddy." because I'm not, I'm sitting here thinking about the very few things I have to do and I'm about as excited to do them as I am about painting a room. Sure picking out the colours is fun but the actual event doesn't really do it for me. I suppose it's the end result that your after right?

Thing is as I may have mentioned before I actually LOVE planning parties. I used to plan corporate parties all the time. Weddings were for me the ultimate party, the first big expression of the new couple! The chance to throw the biggest and best party of your life! Until we moved I had almost every issue of Martha Stewart Weddings every published. I had ideas coming out of my ears. I used to joke that I could plan several different weddings in an instant because I had them all up in my head just waiting to go! When I got engaged all of my friends congratulated me and then told me they couldn't wait for my wedding because it was going to be so awesome.
I have no doubt it would have been.

Now though that I have nothing to really plan or do. No venue to decorate, no linens to pick out, no music, nothing really cool to plan I feel bored and indifferent to it all. Yes I'm getting married to the man I love(even if it is in a dress that he hates.) so hip hip hooray so that's the end result.
I'm feel like there is nothing to do anymore and that all those ideas up in my head will have to continue living there.

My long weekend.

2009-05-19T12:24:00.004-04:00

I'm still suffering some long weekend confusion...it's Tuesday but Monday? ouch.

My weekend was filled to the brim with stuff. I got up at 6:30am to go to Home Depot and get soil on sale, went to a first birthday party and ate too much fattening food, my parents came to visit, went shopping with my mother who confirmed she has wretched taste in clothing, hung out with friends and gardened. Somehow even though I packed in so much stuff it still feels like it was a short long weekend.

It has come to my attention that my mother is really gunning for a red dress. Not just any red dress either. Everyone she pulled off the rack was basically club wear suitable for someone in their early 20's. Every time I showed her something suitable and nice IE: a classic cut silk navy dress she scoffed and made up some excuse as to why she couldn't wear it. She wants something that attracts attention. Something that will get her stared at, because heaven forbid that she isn't the center of attention for one day. I on the other hand want her just to not look like an ex stripper on holiday in Vegas. I don't expect her to wear a normal mother of the bride dress because that's just not her but I'm afraid that she will venture out on her own and buy something and that something will be red and bedazzled and short.

The other thing that I started thinking of is having a dessert and punch type reception shortly after the ceremony. How does one go about inviting people to JUST the reception? Is it tacky seeing as really the ceremony is the least costly and really that is what the wedding is all about right? Inviting people to the reception but not the ceremony is really just inviting them to a party right?
What is odder? Having a reception a year later or having it closer but not inviting people to the ceremony?

Ebay is okay.

2009-05-16T21:33:00.002-04:00

Guess who hunted down the Nanette Lepore Gin Sling dress from this post? MOI!
I admit to finding it on Ebay. I haven't bought much off of Ebay, actually I've only bought 6 things and half of those have been camera related. One of my hobbies is photography and I enjoy shooting film on vintage cameras. The Mister has bought a lot off of Ebay, in fact I'm sure that all of my Christmas gifts our first year together were from there. Including the ill fitting ugly sweater he bought. I wore it but oh, man it was....not fun.
I have always been leery of buying clothes though because there are so many what ifs . What if it doesn't fit? What if it's a fake? What if it has an stain or rip? The possibilities are endless for a mind like mine that spends 75% of the time worrying about things outside the realm of possibilities!

Now I just need to find the perfect black heels to go with it!

I bow to....get it bow..vow...oh nevermind.

2009-05-13T15:27:00.006-04:00

If I had oddles of money I would have a shoe closet that would make Carrie Bradshaw weep.

My feet fit into my Nanny's heels(and she only wore heels, even her slippers were heels!) around the age of 8 (size 5) and by age 12 I was in my mom's size 7's. Heels were something I was naturally comfortable in even though they often made me taller then most of the men around me. My sister is even better in heels, she's only 5'1" or so and could run in stripper heels if she needed to. Even though in recent years I haven't worn heels as much because I tend to work in offices with very laid back dress codes and now that I'm older the rest of my body seems to protest prolonged wearing of them.

There was no doubt in my mind that I would not be wearing flats at my wedding if I was wearing a shorter gown. I then got the vision of shoes with a giant bow in my head, so the hunt began.

My first stop was My Glass Slipper where I found endless beauties that fit the bill....

I don't know Stuart Weitzman(above) personally but I'd like to be his BFF, so he could give me shoes. I'd even take the shoes that didn't turn out right. Because that's what BFF's do.

These strappy deals are by Something Bleu. Although they are actually blanc.

Kate Spade. I'd like to take Kate Spade on a picnic, I'd steal her keys and then steal all her purses and shoes. She'd forgive me though because I pack a mean picnic basket.

I'm all sorts of in love with these Giusseppe Zanotti shoes, even if I did have to triple check the spelling of his name. That bow is so oragamic, see what I did there? Totally a play on words!

Badgley Mischka. I'd just call them Mark and James, even though I can pronounce Mischka.

Brief updated.

2009-05-11T17:04:00.004-04:00

I'm currently writing out a pros and cons list. I'm a big fan of lists especially the pros and cons kind. I need one of them to outweigh the other so I can make some sort of steps in some sort of direction. I can't believe I'm still at this point, I'm dead tired of it.

I go for my second MRI tomorrow morning at 7am. Which means I will be waking up at the unfortunate hour of 5am. Since I don't drive I have to rely on the public transit system to get to the hospital which is not exactly in a convenient location. I'd take a taxi but it would end up costing me an arm and a leg...although I guess going to a hospital they would be able to reattach them.

Want, want, want!

2009-05-07T09:51:00.003-04:00

So I decided to have an engagement shoot. This was something we didn't think we could afford but catching a deal on my dress means that we can! Hooray! Since I'm hitting the gym on a daily basis these days I want to wait until mid summer to have the shoot. Yes I'm being vain.

Another reason is so I can hunt down this dress....

Nanette Lepore's Gin Sling Sheath. Swoooon!

Unfortunately it's nowhere. There are two on ebay, one is size 8 the other 10. It is conceivable that I might be able to wear the 10. I have things in my closet that are that size and they fit me(barely). But this is a designer 10, which for some reason isn't the same as a Gap 10. Blah.

Funny story about this dress though. So I showed it to The Mister and he said "That would look nice on you." and then we both started searching for it(we didn't know the name, I thought it may be Nanette Lepore.) once we found it I said something about wanting to wear it to our friends wedding and he goes "oh I thought you wanted it for something else" and after I picked myself up off the floor I was like "umm. ok..well it's multi coloured and not very bridey." Seriously.

Quick recap. The RED dress was well....red...and I COULDN'T WEAR A RED DRESS! Panic ensued! It was also not very bridey. See that dress up there? Would you consider it "bridey"? nope me neither.

On the bright side I will not have to worry about getting my hair done for my wedding as I will have torn it all out by then!

Veiled love.

2009-05-06T15:37:00.003-04:00

I am in serious love with this veil. Her name is Ginger and she is the perfect amount of eccentric for me. I also think that since my dress is shorter and form fitting I can get away with such a nutty over the top veil. I know it's not for everyone, but I like things that are offbeat.

Here are two shorties that I dig. They are all sweet and innocent and would also look nice with my dress.

See? Choices will be my downfall! I fully plan on having two veils one for the ceremony and one for tea. What other time will I ever get to wear a veil? Some girls have a reception dress I have a reception veil.

All of these veils are from Sarah Gabriel

Hump day!

2009-05-06T09:40:00.003-04:00

Whoa it's Wednesday already? Good grief.

Last week I received an invite to my friends wedding. She of the Chanel outfit and Louboutin shoes. Needless to say it shall be incredibly lovely and amazing. This is her second marriage. I almost crashed her first wedding 10 years ago as the Mister and I had just met and I had convinced a friend to take a road trip to see him on the evening of the wedding to go to the after party, although I didn't know where it was! She also the first (and only so far, knock on wood) friend in that circle to get divorced. I still remember the shock that I felt when I was told. I admit I cried at work. Although not the first friend to get divorced she was the first one I was shocked to hear about.
I know, I know talking about divorce on a blog that is suppose to be about weddings seems somewhat taboo and a bit of a downer but it's a fact of life for us all according to the stats.
Anyhoot...
I'm really excited about attending her wedding, it's going to be amazing! It also just happens to be on my birthday! Can someone say new outfit? I'm hoping to get something I can also wear for our engagement photos. Hooray for shopping!(oh I say this now come back after I've gone and I'll surely be a teary mess! I seem to love it until I have to actually do it!)

I felt like such a knob though filling out the dietary restrictions on the RSVP card. For the most part we stick to a vegetarian diet except we both eat fish(for me I only eat it depending on how it's prepared.) which would be easy to put down as pescetarian...except I also eat chicken and occasionally bacon which is IMHO the only type of pork. Neither of us eat red meat. I only started eating chicken regularly a couple of years back so up until then I always put vegetarian as my meal option if there was one. For the most part all the vegetarian options have been fine but almost 100% of the time they have been pasta. It's like this practically any restaurant you go to so I am used to it. But after more than half my life spent eating strictly vegetarian I am kind of over pasta as my option.

Make it stop.

2009-05-03T00:42:00.007-04:00

"I hate that one. It looks like a doily."

That is what The Mister said about this dress. Which is the reason men don't have the joy of wearing dresses because they don't know squat about them. They clearly should stick to suits for fancy attire.

I went out looking one last time, this time by myself. Even though I am now the owner of that dress and even though I lurve it I like to torture myself. After we bought our house I still looked at houses. I'm a sucker for punishment. Yes, yes I know, I know once you buy a dress you don't keep looking it's bad news all over. So.....I tried on this dress, what I had nothing else to do that day......

image source

and instantly fell in love with it, maybe because it was a lower budget version of this one. Now there would be a dilemma if this dress was in my price range and not double it, I even called a friend who talked me off my "but if I only ate ramen for the rest of the summer I could afford it" ledge. At 1600 it's pretty reasonably priced for a wedding dress in general, just not for me. I admit I came home and searched for it online to no avail she is no where that I can find on line for a fraction of her retail price. I'm trying to be all zen about it, all "well then it wasn't meant to be. everything happens for a reason." etc, etc.

I totally surprised myself by being totally "meh" about trying on dresses. I'm sure that all the sales ladies were like "WTF" because where other gals were tearing up and gushing over dresses I was like "hmm..it's pretty." I totally have wedding dress aspergers. I mean I knew I wouldn't cry over a dress(not in that way anyhow.) but I thought I would at least feel something about one of them, something that told me that it was the one. Maybe because I've heard so many women say "they just knew" when they tried in on. I didn't and something in me feels a bit cheated by it. I've tried on dresses that were the price of cars, I've tried on dresses of every single silhouette and fabric, I've tried on dresses I would never even imagine wearing...just in case I was missing something. Not one of them spoke to me. Some of them I liked more than others like this one and the one I bought but none of them told me they were mine.

I woke up this morning and sketched out my "dream dress" something I thought I knew about but until I tried on a million things knew nothing about. Honestly how does anyone find a dress when they go out looking for one thing, try on another and realises that everything they thought they wanted in a dress is a BIG FAT LIE.

I now know I want a sweetheart neckline. A neckline that before trying it on I deemed well....tacky, but once I tried it one realised that it made the most of my assets and somehow looked stunning, in the way that I want every single one of my tops to have this neckline. Seriously. Then there's the dropped waist, corsetted, modified A-line. If all those ingredients were in one dress I would scoop it up in every colour it came in no questions asked.

Which leads me to the dreaded question....do I go to a dressmaker and have this dress made? Seriously...will I end up one of those crazy brides that ends up buying like 4 dresses because she just can't make a decision? I know all the names I would name my unborn children but I cannot decide on a dress for my tiny wedding! Ugh. I could have a really simple version of what I want made and then add the floof I love after it's all done onto the bust and straps.

Oh gosh...I've created a monster.

If only....

2009-04-30T22:28:00.000-04:00

A while back I stumbled upon this little gem on Frugal Bride while looking for a vendor. It burns my bread to read it because isn't eloping the most frugal option? For a site that wants to promote frugalness they sure seem to look down their noses at elopers. Thing is I actually like the site. There is a lot of useful information on there, especially for Canadians. So having something like this on there is really insulting. Maybe though I'm over reacting......

WHY DO PEOPLE ELOPE?
Parents don't like your choice of partner.
Just wanna get married and get it over with
Illness
Your fiancée is pregnant
You're going to jail
You're going to war
You're leaving the country
You want to become a citizen of a country
Spur of the moment thing, "What the heck, let's do it!"

Wow right? So I'm reading this and thinking "Wow too bad I'm not a sick ,jailed, pregnant, immigrant who is going off to war, whose parents hate my fiance" but then there's also the "Ugh we hate wedding lets get this over with" line and the "Oh my god we just met! We are soul mates! Let's get married!" line. Really those are all the reasons to elope? What about "We cannot afford a big wedding and don't want to go into debt to host one" or "We just want the two of us and our closest family there." or "Let's spend the money we were going to use on one day on XYZ instead"

It's really funny to me that the wedding world just assumes that every bride wants to have her Cinderella ball and that if you don't there must be something wrong with you..like perhaps your dying or in the country illegally.

What's a bride?

2009-04-30T11:48:00.005-04:00

So you might have guessed that the September plan is going forward. I'll continue planning unless my neurologist(seriously when did I become the girl with a bunch of specialists?) tells me that those lesions on my brain are something gruesome...I mean more gruesome than lesions, seriously could that be a more ugly word? You could totally be all "Girl...did you see that dress? It's totally a lesion." maybe because for some reason it also makes me think of leprosy and leeches....anyhow. ON WITH THE SHOW!!!!

It's really odd how the wedding industry works it's magic. Somehow without me even knowing it sneakily seduced The Mister with the idea of what a wedding dress should be. When he saw the red dress he said it wasn't very "bridey" or "weddingy" (the fact that neither of these are actual words didn't matter to him." but couldn't really elaborate on what either of those words meant to him. More white? More lace? More train? What exactly? Isn't the fact that I'm wearing it make it "bridey" and the fact that I'm at a wedding make it "weddingy"?

He deemed this dress "Not bad"

and I agree, but who wants to wear a "not bad" dress to get married in? Would you want a "not bad hair cut"? I forget who made this dress but the material was meltable and it was around the same price as the lace dress. This dress he called "cute". CUTE!

I don't know about you but cute is not what I want to be called by my man on my wedding day! Words that I would like are: hot, stunning, gorgeous, beautiful, sexy, oh my god lets make babies! Things like that. Not cute.

So you've all seen the lace dress. So what do you think he said when he saw it? Any guesses?

Hint: it wasn't cute.

My mother's secret Vegas showgirl dream.

2009-04-28T09:28:00.004-04:00

So my second weekend of wedding dress shopping I ventured to my home town for, which is just 40 minutes by train from my house. I didn't think I would find anything I really liked but I was pleasantly surprised. I had decided to go there and try on dresses so I could have the sister, a bff and my mother come out and watch me try various frocks on. It would have been hard to get all 3 in the same spot otherwise and well...honestly having my mother around tends to make me lose my mind rather fast. I love her but there are more issues there than Reader's Digest.
My first appointment was at 3pm.
We go to pick up my mother who, like me, does not drive or have a license(I do have my motorcycle license.) she looks perfectly fine in jeans and a top. Right before we go to leave she goes and changes into a clingy long dress that doesn't look that great on her. My dad asks why she changed and she tells him that she wanted something easy to get off if she decides to try on dresses.
See my mother has a habit of making anything and everything about her. Sometimes it's manageable but when she's going on about how she would give you some clothes she no longer wears but they wouldn't fit because they are size 4 and should she keep them just in case you do lose the weight?....well...my mind starts to melt. I could start a whole new blog just about her and I would be able to post every day for the rest of my life.
I'm blow off the comment because of course if she saw something she liked she should try it on, I wouldn't mind. It just seems that all she can think about is finding herself a dress. We get to the store and enter and there is a pile of shoes and a sign asking everyone to please remove their shoes. My mother balks at this several times standing there asking me if she has to. Which I find funny because she's wearing sandals so she's practically barefoot already. I start going through the gowns and she walks across the store still in her shoes! I tell her she has to remove them and she acts flabbergasted and states that she isn't trying on dresses. I explain to her that a lot of bridal stores ask you to remove your shoes, white dresses and dirt after all are not the best of combos. She finally takes them off. Phew. The store over all really only had one type of silhouette so I mostly tried on dresses for "fun" they had two suitable dresses that were shorter "destination" dresses but both of them were made of material that was awful. One of them felt like sleeping bag material, nylon maybe, and the other was 100% polyester. YUM!
She made some comments that were..well..embarrassing, about my boobs and my sisters boobs and completely making something up that apparently I used to always say but in actuality have never once uttered. But over all it wasn't too bad, she didn't seem too into the being there and kept showing my sister dresses she liked that were really, really, well....tacky. She told my sister that I had told her I wanted her to wear red, which I hadn't but my mom likes to wear red so she stands out and I could handle a red dress but all the ones she liked were suitable for a Vegas show girl and not my 54 year old mother.

The next morning I called her to tell her we'd be going to store number two at 11:30am.
She says "Ok we'll meet you there."
Me: "Uhhh who is we?"
Her: "My friend and I."
Now, I have met this person once, maybe twice. I honestly couldn't pick her out of a lineup if I had to. I totally pulled a Bridezilla and said "Um no, this is just for you, my sister and bff. No one else. I don't want someone I've met once there." she snippily said "fine, fine." and hung up.
I asked my sister and bff if I was being crazy and they assured me I wasn't. Seriously who does that? It's not like this friend is an old family friend, my mom has only known her for maybe 5 years or so. When we arrived and had to remove our shoes again she acted like she was being asked to walk around naked. Even though I'd already told her she would have to! Argh.

The second store had more dresses but was poorly laid out, the staff wasn't exactly helpful but they were nice. Since they didn't take appointments the staff was spread thin once the place started getting crowded. Again my mother started pulling out show girl dresses...now please remember that my wedding will be on a Friday afternoon followed by high tea. Here is something I think would be suitable....
Now here is something similar to the dresses that my mother was thinking she could wear.......

This is why I'm going with her to find her dress. Imagine if I was having a formal evening wedding?

Are you my dress?

2009-04-27T11:19:00.003-04:00

Another weekend of trying on dresses. This time for fun I went to my home town and my sister, a bff and my mother came along for the ride(Oh man my mother..I'll have a whole post coming up on that!). I have a whole whack of photos of dresses that were beautiful but inappropriate for Friday afternoon nuptials. We were about to leave the second store when we went into a room that I thought held M.O.B dresses but actually was the clearance room. Usually clearance rooms are full of frocks from the 80's and 90's sad dresses that no one even wanted then and are now doomed to live out the rest of their lives at a fraction of their original price until someone needs a costume. Not this one! Sure it had some atrocities but most of the gowns were just from last seasons collections and were styles that just were not popular in my home town. I pawed through them (there is no gentle way to pull out a gown smooshed in with 30 others!) and there on the rack were three Pronovias/La Sposa dresses that were simply amazing, including one short one.
I tried them on and all of them were beautiful but the short one was the most the first dress I felt comfortable in. It was bridey but not too formal or bedazzled. You wanna see? Yes? Ok then....

The quality is stunning. Handmade lace? Yes please! Silk lining? Alright! 70% off? You don't say! The dress is by La Sposa, I cannot find a photo of it on line making me think it might be from a 2008 collection or a 2007. It's a bit tight but that should be easily fixed. One of my favorite things though is that I'll be able to wear a normal bra! Hooray. It's on hold while I thought about it and I think I love it. I had to go away and think because I'm a bit of a deal whore and wanted to make sure that I wasn't in love because it was a fraction of it's original price. I honestly don't think that I will find anything as lovely for the same price or even close. And since it is all natural fibres I can easily get it dyed and wear it again!

And yes pretty much every photo of me wearing a wedding dress is me posed like this. Freakin' mutton arms.

Double fives!

2009-04-24T12:19:00.003-04:00

Seriously April is kicking my butt.

Yesterday I felt nauseous as I went into work by 11am I was laying on the floor of the office bathroom shivering and puking up my yogurt and berries.

(No, I'm not pregnant. Seems if a lady is puking that is the first question everyone asks!)

A co-worker drove me home where I was sick some more, took some Pepto pills(no way could I drink that stuff...ew.) and slept like I had been drugged for about 5 hours. I ate a banana, some toast and The Mister brought me apple juice.

I had a fever of 102 and could barely walk. My head was pounding. Over all it was horrific.

Then I woke up this morning and felt fine. 100% better.

Seriously what the heck?

Stomach bug? Another bout of food poisoning? Could April get anymore sickly?

Anyhoot...I weighed myself this morning because other than yesterday I have been pretty good this week, getting to the gym 3 times and eating pretty well. I'm willing to guess that half of this loss is from yesterday though.

Seriously though two 5's! I cannot remember the last time I saw two 5's in a row on a scale!

Let's play dress up!

2009-04-22T20:10:00.010-04:00

So on Saturday we headed to an early appointment at White in Yorkville here in Toronto. I honestly don't think I will ever enter another store with such amazing customer service. It truly was perfection. Everything was organized by designer and we got our own HUGE room to try on dresses. It was grand! I did find out that mermaid dresses look horrid on me, if I ever want to show off all the worst parts of my body I will wear a mermaid dress. We took some photos of the ones we liked, to show my mother and sister who weren't able to make it.

This is one of the dresses I tried on, obviously that is not me, the Oscar De La Renta rack was full of dresses I wanted to marry. Seriously this picture just does not do the dress justice. It was breath taking...on the rack. On me...well, hello child bearing hips! Guess ten grand couldn't fix that!

Oh look it's my headless body! (The photos were all taken from a downward angle so I cut off my head to save everyone from the many chins of doom!)
This darling, wonderful, beauty is the handy work of Monique Lhuiller. The detail on the bodice was dreamy. On it made me feel like dancing! I joked that I was going to knock out the sales girl and make a run for it, yes...joked that's it...ha.ha. errrr. She was less than the Oscar, but more than say...a used car...at 5800. Sigh. You can sort of see my ring in the photo proving to all that I am actually engaged. Yes someone totally wants to marry me.

Now on to the infamous red dress.....

It had pockets! For my stuff! I still think it's a darling dress and the colour makes me realise that I need more red in my wardrobe! Those shoes were so comfy, Oscar De La Renta yet again! They cost more than the dress! Like double!

The Jenny Packham dresses were beautiful, this one had straps that formed triangles in the back that were incredibly beaded. The dress just floated and swooshed around. Again the angle makes me look like I'm preggers but I am grateful that my friend was able to take some photos! The boutique even fed them! Tiny lemon poppy scones, chocolate chip cookies, chocolate macaroons! I want to go there every week!

Thinking thoughts about things.

2009-04-21T09:59:00.003-04:00

First off thank you ladies for A) all your comments, it's good to have people who are detached from the situation to offer level headed advice and B) for actually reading through that last posts numerous cluttered backwards sentences. Although a bar in the bathroom would have been nice there wasn't, but I'm assuming y'all knew that!

I honestly have not been the same since Sunday. I feel completely disconnected and out of sorts. It could be the horrid weather here in T.O, rain, rain, rain and oh look it's raining!
I just feel like I need to rethink everything. Like this plan was patched together because I compromised what I wanted to the very basics with the promises that there would be X, Y, Z if our wedding went this route. Z can only happen if Y does and right now I'm not confident that Y will happen. I need to think and then think some more and then when I'm think I'm done thinking I've got to think about it again. I need to know that what I'm doing is right.

Also I haven't talked about this because I didn't want to be a big downer, but I recently found out that I have lesions on my brain, a lot according to my neurologist. I don't know if a lot is 3 or if it's 100, when he told me I was too shocked to ask. Apparently lesions only occur on the brain through trauma or disease. I haven't suffered any trauma to the best of my knowledge. My next MRI is in May and they will be injecting me with some gadolinium which they didn't do last time. I keep telling myself it is nothing to worry about but every shooting pain in my head and every time something feels odd I can't help but wonder if it's because of that. In truth I am scared. If by some bizarre twist of fate I am actually sick I want to have the original wedding I had planned. I want to dance with my friends and eat amazing food. I want a night to remember. I know it sounds horrible but that's what I always wanted. I'm seriously one of the most glass half full people you will meet, at least I try to be, I don't take anything very seriously except health because without your health what do you have?

I've got so much on my plate right now and I'm just not hungry at all. I just keep pushing it all around and soon it's going to be one big gross mess of stuff.

You Say Tomato...

2009-04-19T18:10:00.007-04:00

I'm just waiting for my friend to send me the photos she was able to take from the dress try outs until I tell you all about my day of being topless around strangers.

I will tell you that I tried on this Jenny Yoo but in red and instantly fell in love with it. I even was thinking about getting it in red because the colour just really looked that good on me.

I then mentioned it being red to The Mister who told me "You can't wear a red wedding dress!" Okay fine I could deal with that. Although to get the dress in white it costs 200 dollars more!! I kid you not!

Last night we were out with friends celebrating The Mister's birthday and I decided to show him the photos from the day. When it got to this one(in red) and said "I hate that one, it doesn't even look like a wedding dress." I hadn't told him that was the one I loved. I ended up in the bar of the bathroom crying and for the last 24 hours have been thinking about calling the whole thing off. Not just because he hates the one dress the fits the budget and looks amazing on me. But because I'm still(STILL!) planning this by myself and I'm just suppose to guess at what he thinks a wedding should be. Like today he again mentioned cake and I finally said "We are not having a cake and I am not wearing a real wedding dress, I want these things, but we are not having them."

So I'm sitting here thinking about what I'm going to do. I could still get my deposit back for the tea no problem and that's the only money that has been put out.

No one warned me!

2009-04-18T17:09:00.001-04:00

Why didn't anyone tell me that trying on wedding dresses was incredibly exhausting?

New pants are needed.

2009-04-17T10:10:00.007-04:00

One of my bff's got herself a sweet little job with Goodlife Fitness at one of their Platinum Plus Women Only gyms AND one of the benefits was she was able to give me a free 3 month membership! The other benefit is I get to see her practically every day and she's one of those people who is really able to motivate others and gets you all excited about how awesome it's going to be even when you know that really jumping up and down for an hour with weights is pretty much the opposite of awesome. Somehow though she makes it fun, she's got that magic!

So for the last two weeks I've been hitting the gym. I only went twice last week due to being sick and I've only gone three times this week(including today) and mostly I've done strength training with some light cardio and lots of walking.I didn't post a weigh in last week because A) I was sick B) I was bloated and C) There was no change from the week before. So I figured I'd just skip it.

This morning I stepped on the scale, got off it and stepped on it again and again. The numbers were the same all four times I stepped on that thing................ Just .8 from 10lbs lost since Feb.26! This also means that since my doctor weighed me back in November I've lost 15lbs! Whoop!

Seriously I did not believe it, mostly because when I finally got over the food poisoning last weekend I could only stomach pancakes and plain pasta. Not exactly the most nutritious foods on the planet!

Another perk of having an insider at the gym is she hooked me up with a fitness assessment which I'm going to on Monday. Should be fun to get all my fat readings and measurements! Hopefully the gym scale is as friendly as my home scale and I don't step on it and get told that I have actually only lost 3lbs and my home scale is a liar because it's tired of me repeatedly stepping on it.

There is a downside though. No it's not my incredibly desire to celebrate with a large chunk of cheese....cake, it's my clothes. Most of my pants are now too big. Yeah I know, poor me, wah, wah, wah. But I loathe shopping for pants. Yes this is great and I am looking forward to a whole new wardrobe BUT I don't want to spend money on these in between sizes while I get there. So I'm off to Joe Fresh to buy some inbetweener clothes to get me through the next 26lbs.

The cranks and gears.

2009-04-16T12:43:00.003-04:00

Woot! Just got an email from Sephora for 15% off...guess where I'm heading at lunch?
I'm thinking I'll get a lip gloss or something for my skin. I heart Sephora!

AND this morning I won a donut(will get a muffin though because A) they seem healthier, although they are probably not and B) a muffin costs more than a donut and it makes it seem like I won MORE! HA!

AND I also won 6 dollars on a 3 dollar scratch ticket. I buy one a week and then if I win I get another and pocket any profit and so on until I lose. Last week I profited 12 dollars!

In wedding news..what?? you didn't come here to read about my petty addictions?...I am having a hard time getting an officiant to respond to me. Seriously I've contacted two and have heard nothing back. I know people are busy but come on! I just want to pay you a crazy amount of money for showing up and making it all legal! If someone called me up and said "Hi can you come out for an hour on a Friday afternoon, talk for 15 minutes and I'll pay you several hundred dollars?" I would be all over that. I'm sure there is some work beforehand, but I'd still be calling people back asap. I've got a couple of others on my list.

Also what does one wear to try on wedding dresses? Obviously not black fish nets but should I wear my Spanx and a strapless bra? Should I bring heels? I'm guessing that red lipstick is a no go as well. Not that I would because I would be so paranoid that I would trip and land lips first into the most expensive dress in the whole store and it would be ruined and they would make me pay for it, which wouldn't be so bad except it would also be the one dress that looked horrible on me. Yes, this is how the gears and cranks in my noggin work.
Oh come on you knew I was that neurotic!

No means no...ok it really means no need to worry.

2009-04-14T15:02:00.003-04:00

I get incredibly nervous when calling up places to make appointments. For some bizarre reason I have this fear that when I ask to book something they will tell me "NO." I know it's crazy.
I have been staring at the list of four bridal salons here in the city and one in my home town for the last few days and finally today picked up the phone and called. To my complete and utter surprise all of them in town had openings this Saturday, of course because I value my sanity I booked only two for this week and the other two for May 2nd. I figured it would be a while until I could get in to any of them, especially on a Saturday! Guess not!
I then called the one place in my home town and had the following conversation....
Me - Hi I'd like to make an appointment to try on some dresses.
Lady(with heavy stern sounding accent) - No.
Me - Ummm no?
Lady - No dear we do not make appointments. You can just come in.
Me - Ohh! So I can just walk in? Ok thank you!

Seriously when she said "No." my heart literally leaped out of my chest it was my worst fear come true! Her accent (honestly a very serious stern sounding European one!) made it sound like she was saying no to me personally! After I got off the phone I laughed and told a coworker who I had just earlier today told of my irrational fear of being told NO!

Playing dress up.

2009-04-14T10:53:00.005-04:00

Since my wedding is a Friday afternoon I obviously will not be wearing a giant ballgown or have a lengthy train...but what I am wondering is what is the line for dresses that if crossed I would look the other side of crazy. I've shown you the Jenny Yoo dresses that I adore and I know that they are daytime high tea appropriate. BUT...what if I wanted a dress that was slightly more formal would I look like a nutbar? Say a dress like this one:

or this one.....
Too fancy right? I'm mostly in love with the polka dot tulle at the bottom of the second one, seriously polka dots on anything = LOVE. I have a fear that I will try on a dress just like one of these and fall in love.

Oh how time flies.

2009-04-12T19:33:00.003-04:00

Bleh..nothing like spending a long weekend dying from food poisoning. Fun times! I had such a bad headache that I was seeing flashing lights it was like a disco in my brain. My stomach still feels like it went several rounds with a boxer.

So here I am with just under five months until we get married. Oh. Ack. Err. Okay time to make a list and check it twice and then start making phone calls and getting things moving because....
OH MY GOSH THERE'S LESS THAN 5 MONTHS UNTIL I GET MARRIED!
I think I've just been slacking because it's such a small affair and it doesn't seem like there is much to do because it's a Friday afternoon high tea and that's all set. I was so looking forward to all the DIY projects to put my own personal stamp on a venue but in the end I'm not having any of that so I'm just left with the basics, none of which I have!

I also realised today that I haven't even looked at dresses. Other than the JCrew one that is hanging sadly in my closet I haven't bothered actually going into a shop and looking. Yeah I know I'm cutting it close, if not too late! Ack! I was dreaming of going dress shopping when I had lost more weight so I wouldn't hate it so much...looks like I'm going to be heading out next weekend if I can..or maybe during my lunch hour..who does that? Who looks at dresses during lunch hour?!?! Can I even do that? How long does it take? Also fascinator/veil, shoes, makeup, hair, jewellery...all that stuff. Oh.oh.oh.oh.

Officiant. yeah still have not dealt with this...bleh.

Ceremony site. Apparently The Mister was going to call some places but apparently he hasn't.

Vows and readings and all that. There's only 14 people attending 4 of them are in the wedding party! I want to get everyone involved and feeling like they are part of something special. Now I have to figure out readings...Little Prince? Velveteen Rabbit? Wizard of Oz? I have no clue what people read at weddings! Dang I've never wished more that I attended church before, those church people always have things planned!

Rings. It's going to be so fun trying to get The Mister to come out jewellery shopping with me. It won't be anything like pulling teeth at all. Oh and my ring was custom made so it should be super fun trying to find a band that fits it!

Flowers. I'm not freaked out about this. Doing my own from either my garden or if that fails hitting up the flower market the day before. Should probably do some trials before though. Just for fun.

Invites. Linocut prints...guess I should go buy some lino and dig out my cutting tools from their hiding place. Better start this soon because I know I'll make mistakes.

Favors...originally I was going to give out jam...but it was going to be The Misters mom's homemade jam but giving his parents and sister the jam, which would basically be giving the jam back to them, seems wrong. Do we give something different to our parents?

What am I forgetting? Something big I bet!
Ok I'm going to go write these things in my calendar and then pull The Mister away from his video game and explain that some things need doing or else I'm going to lose my mind.

It was Ravioli.

2009-04-11T19:46:00.002-04:00

Sorry for lack of posts this week.
After finally kicking the head cold by Friday and having a good night with friends The Mister and I woke up this morning feeling all sorts of gross. We soon realised we had a nice little bout of food poisoning on our hands.
The only thing we can pinpoint eating that may have caused it was the ravioli we had for dinner last night.
blah.

Keys to my heart!

2009-04-08T10:57:00.003-04:00

Have you seen the Tiffany keys?

My obsession with old fashioned keys started when I was very young, my Nanny moved into a house that had mysterious keys left behind. I imagined that they unlocked some sort of magical door that led to a secret room. A room untouched by time. Prices start at 130CDN for a simple silver key. This would be one key I would never misplace!

Sick,sick,sick.

2009-04-07T09:48:00.002-04:00

Sooo sick. Be back when I don't feel like someone has filled my head with hot pudding.
I'd like to thank The Mister for bringing it home. Although I'm not acting half as sick as he was...what is it with men when they are sick? Do they all turn into two year olds?

It's been a good run but...

2009-04-04T14:57:00.004-04:00

I think I'm over Martha Stewart Weddings magazine.

For the last ten years(oh who am I kidding? I've been buying it for much longer than that!) I have been a member of the cult of MS Weddings. Pouring over the pages and feeling my heart rate rise with each lovely image. I started to notice the effects wearing off some time last year, yes it was still incredible eye candy and yes it was still inspiring but something was missing. I just didn't know what. Had they changed? Had I changed? I just couldn't put my finger on it.

Yesterday I saw the new Spring issue and as I have for every issue I bought it without looking at the contents. I got it home and did my little ritual of pouring myself some wine before cracking it open. Something happened that had never happened before. I put it down without going cover to cover. Maybe it was because they are starting to recycle ideas, the cootie catcher? A flower made of tissue? Covered match boxes? I was starting to feel a bit like I was having deja vu. Then there was the sheer amount of things with outlandish prices.You know that MSWeddings isn't feeling the recession when they recommend 420 dollar face cream or acne skin treatments that cost 400-600 dollars per treatment! Yes it is all still incredibly lovely but it was a bit like an exercise in voyeurism into this land where money grows on trees and every gal has a 10 carat diamond and a 10 grand dress.

It suddenly dawned on me that wedding magazines are like late night informercials. They show you how amazing something is over and over until you start to think that you just couldn't possibly live without it.

I love Martha Stewart(lets face she's a sassy broad who'd I'd invite over to dinner in a heartbeat.) in general but perhaps because of the economic times were all facing, the excess that is the Weddings magazine just isn't a world I feel comfortable even peaking into at the moment.

So I'm going to break up with her. Sure I might has a quick fling with her in the Summer and Fall(my favorite issue) but I might have to contain them to reading in store, and there's always the internet if I feel lonely.
So farewell MS Weddings I know you will bring joy to many, many other girls hearts like you once did mine.
It's not you it's me.

Week six!

2009-04-03T09:26:00.004-04:00

Sorry for being M.I.A this week. Work has been so busy, yesterday I stayed until 8pm! A couple of things happened this week one of them was I ate two fast food meals. I fully admit that while eating them I thought "oh this is heaven." but about 5 minutes after I was finished I felt incredibly sick which is obviously why I went back for more the next day you know just to make sure. Despite the delicious fries or maybe because of them I did get out daily for exercise. I took my dog for an hour and a half walk, climbed up about 80 stairs and saw a deer on someones front lawn! It's always so magical to see something like that in the city. I was fully prepared this morning to step on the scale and see that I'd either gained more weight or stayed the same.

So I was thrilled to bits when I saw the number appear.........

Ahh back on track!

Stuff so far.

2009-04-02T16:58:00.003-04:00

I always said I worked best under a tight deadline. Every essay I wrote the day it was due always came back with at least a 90.

So far I've got a photographer, verbally booked, just waiting for her to send over a contract.

Our reception venue contract signed, dollars deposited.

I've decided what I'm going to do for the few invitations we are sending out. I'm not sure how many people know what linocut prints are but it's one of the art mediums I can honestly brag about being somewhat good at. Limited edition prints as invitations!

Made a short list of ceremony sites that we are interested in.

Talked about favors.

Ok so we should probably book an officiant. That's probably the biggest thing that's missing right now. I mean we could get married in any old outfits but you need an officiant to make it all legal. How do you pick a stranger to perform a life changing ceremony? My number one choice would be a friend, but here in Ontario you cannot get a quick internet ordainment. Nope it has to be a recognized member of clergy or a justice of peace. At least that's my understanding from all the things I have read on government sites. Sure there's all sorts of people to choose from but it's all a bit like speed dating. It's easy to like someone based on a conversation where they are trying to sell themselves. I've heard horror stories of officiants not remembering names, showing up drunk, deviating from the script. I just want something simple, meaningful where we say our vows, exchange rings and kiss. I don't even understand why we need an officiant once we have a marriage license!

Pretty perfect weekend.

2009-03-30T22:36:00.004-04:00

Bought myself flowers on the weekend. Some anemones, lisianthus and a big white hydrangea. I also bought an obscene amount of cheese. It was so sunny and beautiful out that I walked around for a good 4 hours. The results were felt as soon as I stopped walking and my leg muscles started doing this weird twitchy thing as if to say "Lady what were you thinking using us for so long without a break!"

Winter makes me forget that I am happiest outside in the sunshine walking about.

Sunday we met with the photographer I liked. I don't know why but when I meet professionals I suddenly become tongue tied, I cannot get a word across that doesn't make me seem like I eat saw dust for breakfast. She's really nice and was super helpful. Her portfolios are awesome. I totally forgot to ask to see a complete shoot, isn't that one of the rules?

I made up my mind pretty quickly that the photography would be the biggest expense for us. The luxury I suppose of having a really small Friday wedding is that a lot of the big expenses are gone leaving extra over for things I really hold important and those things are a fraction of the price! Huzzah!

We spent Sunday afternoon in a corporate box for the Toronto Raptors game. I admit I don't think I've ever watched a basketball game once. Other than it had a ball, some baskets and some very tall men I knew little about the game. I'm happy to say I really enjoyed it. I always find big sporting events incredibly surreal and they seem to bring out the ADD in me I just look around the arena and then remember what I'm there for. It's truly sensory overload. Of course it doesn't hurt that we were treated to unlimited snacks including warm cookies and our pick of ice creams! The game was most exciting during the last quarter when the Chicago Bulls shot a 3 pointer right as the buzzer went tying the game! The Raptors won in the overtime but for a while there my heart was pounding and I even threw my fists in the air when they regained the lead!

I got a package in the mail.

2009-03-28T16:38:00.003-04:00

The dress arrived!
It's lovely. It's a bit big but it drapes nicely over my body and the colour is really nice, sort of a candle light colour if that makes sense which is very flattering on pasty white me.
I like it, but I don't LOVE it. I could easily wear it, but my heart doesn't belong to it. I tried it on and I was just like "Well it looks nice." I wanted to look in the mirror and feel something but I didn't. I just felt like I feel when I try on a nice dress. Does that make sense?
I want a dress that says "Hi I'm getting married today!" I want a dress that makes me feel special, stunning and like a bride.
Most of all it just didn't feel like me. I felt weird and old in it. Maybe it was the floor length, I don't think I've owned a floor length dress...hmmm ever! I felt a bit like I was a kid wearing my mothers formal gown playing dress up. Maybe it was because it came in a box to my work. I think what I'll do is try it on again in a couple of weeks and see how I feel about it then.

Week 5...well I'm still alive.

2009-03-27T10:10:00.003-04:00

Well I knew it would happen eventually. I gained weight. I think it's mostly water weight and maybe even some muscle because the fat percentage part was down more! Ok, so for the sake of being completely honest I'm going to tell you that the first time I did the fat reading it was a 39.6% yeah almost half of my body was fat. That image is pretty bleak. It's been steadily falling over the last 4 weeks last week if I remember correctly last week it was 34%. This morning it told me I was only 31.4% fat. Sweet! I know scales aren't 100% accurate in these readings but down is still down right?

Next week I'm going to start upping my exercise. I'm aiming to walk for an hour or more each day and spend at least 20 minutes on the elliptical machine and do one of my dvd's 3 times a week. I figure if I aim to do a lot even if I only end up doing half of that I'll still be good! I'm happy that winter is over so I can get back outside again!

Friday frustration.

2009-03-27T09:44:00.003-04:00

Every week around Thursday I ask The Mister the same thing.

"What is going on this weekend?" This weekend I knew that there was going to be another beer brewing on Saturday and we have an appointment with a photographer on Sunday, so I was sort of asking what else needed to be done. So when he answered and said "Well brewing on Saturday and a record show on Sunday" I was thrown for a loop. See record shows take hours for him. Hours of flipping through bins and looking at labels and pressing numbers and all sorts of weird nerdy record collector stuff. So I was surprised when he told me as there had been no mention of it in the last few weeks.
"Well what time is that because we're meeting the photographer at 2:30"
"Noon, but I made plans for this weeks ago, can't we change the time we see the photographer? Why don't we go see her tomorrow?"
"No, I made this appointment two weeks ago, I asked you if it was fine, you agreed on the time."
"Well I forgot about the record show!"
We were in bed when this conversation was happening so I couldn't storm out of the room or even throw my hands up in the air. Instead I said "I'm glad to know that records are more of a priority than our wedding."
"Why do we have to meet her? Can't she just show up?"
"No."
At this point he said "I guess I can go to the record show earlier."

I'm sort of even wondering why were bothering to get married. Why even spend 2500 bucks on something it seems only I'm into? I could spend that money on shoes I could spend it one going to Paris..alone. I could spend it on braces for my teeth! I can think of about 2500 things to spend it on!
Why is everything suddenly an uphill battle? I've compromised and compromised and he doesn't even care.

Something Blue.

2009-03-25T20:18:00.004-04:00

Because I hate just leaving up bitchy sounding posts, I thought I'd follow that last one really quickly with this one. This is another dress I will most likely hunt down and try on. It might be too fancy to wear at a mid day ceremony..but really I don't care! It gives me a sort of saloon girl vibe and I sort of dig that. Also the layered tulle makes my heart race a bit and you can't see it in this photo but the shoulder action is really hot. It makes me wish I has somewhere fancy to go so I could wear this and I mean like big dinner fancy not like Whole Foods fancy, although maybe with the right shoes I could totally rock this while buying some corn pie and organic milk.

Image from Neiman Marcus